Last month, I had the privilege of celebrating the wedding of a former student and colleague from Father Judge High School in Philadelphia. Shane Dougherty and Christina Wacker were married at St. Matthews Parish in Conshohocken, PA.
“My God, I give you this action, please give me the grace to conduct myself during it in a manner most pleasing to You.
May God be praised!
St. Francis de Sales, pray for us. Amen.”
Before the Mass began, I was with Shane and his friends (all Judge grads) in the sacristy of the church. We were telling stories and reminiscing about high school, and they were filling me in on the path each of them had taken over the last few years. This gathering of the priest with the groomsmen before the nuptial Mass has been a ritual repeated at almost every Catholic wedding. However, what happened next is something that I believe may be unique to men and women with Salesian backgrounds. A few minutes before we were to go out into the main body of the church, Shane turned to me and asked if we could pray the Direction of Intention. This prayer is a practice inspired by the writings of St. Francis de Sales that invites God to be with us and to give us grace and strength to face all the good and the difficulties we may encounter. This prayer is said in all our Oblate schools before each class, each game, and each event. Our Oblates in parish life have adapted it to the rhythms of a church community and offer it before Masses, meetings, and other ministries.
Mr. & Mrs. Shane and Christina Dougherty with Fr. Jack Kolodziej, OSFS.
My former students easily remembered the prayer and one guy said that, thanks to his high school language courses, he could still recite the prayer in Spanish. Seeing these young men pray together, and pray using a Salesian method, I was thankful for the enduring influence of St. Francis de Sales and his spirituality. This made me grateful that our schools not only influence the minds of our students but also their spirits - and left a lasting impact on their lives. It reminded me that Salesian Spirituality is about connecting and living in the real world.
In the Salesian way of life, we come to “live like Jesus” in the ordinary moments of life. We bring Jesus to the ordinary people in our lives: our families, our friends, and our neighbors. De Sales encouraged Christians to deepen those relationships and recognize Jesus in the actions, the people, and the paths of life.
As their friend was about to make a major life commitment, this group of thirty-something-year-old men asked God to be with them. They stood together and renewed their relationship with God and one another. They recognized the sacred moment before them and they offered it to God. As they repeated the words of a prayer they had been saying since they were fourteen years old, they requested God’s grace.
In that extraordinary moment, they were friends, they were brothers… they were Salesian gentlemen.
Father Jack Kolodziej, OSFS
Provincial
Wilmington-Philadelphia Province
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