Saint Paul reflected on struggles with these words: “What I do, I do not understand. For I do not do what I want, but I do what I hate.” (Romans 7:15)
Saint Augustine brought some humor to struggles in his famous prayer: “Lord, make me a good and chaste Christian…but not yet!” He shortened it to a frequent and favorite expression: “Tomorrow and tomorrow!” Augustine tells us that for years, as he said this prayer, he somehow justified his own mediocrity to himself.
I find it consoling to know that saints struggled for years with moral mediocrity, laziness, and bad habits. They, like us, could cave into these things with a shrug saying: “Tomorrow, I will make a new start!” We are in good company as we share their interior dilemma.
While there is consolation in this approach, there are times when this interior struggle over sins we cannot conquer can build up to a heavy sense of failure and frustration. Indeed, Saint Paul expresses those feelings in his statement: “What I do, I do not understand.”
There are countless times in the confessional when I’ve heard individuals speak of overwhelming guilt in the struggle with the same sin constantly present in their life. They find these many sins repeatedly present and unable to conquer, weighing heavy in their heart. This frustration and failure can lead to despair.
When I face this in the confessional, I repeatedly attempt to lift this burden with words like: “I believe that we are much harsher and more critical of our failures and sins than God could ever be. I suspect God copes much better with our faults than we cope with each other and ourselves.”
We continue in this Easter Season celebrating the Resurrection of Jesus that promises things can always be new again. It’s never too late to start over. Every day begins as a blank page. This is when our belief in God’s love for us and our repentance for our failures and sins unleash the all-powerful mercy of God. So take heart, the sentiment of Augustine echoed by the words of Saint Francis de Sales below is rooted in God’s all-merciful presence in those who seek Him.
“It is right that you should begin again every day. There is no better way to complete the spiritual life than to be ever beginning it over again.” - Saint Francis de Sales
Father Jack Loughran, OSFS
Provincial
Toledo-Detroit Province
