Work is piling up and Zoom is malfunctioning. We can’t see anyone’s face, our friends are not allowed to visit our homes, our favorite restaurants are closed, and the atmosphere reeks of fear.
Thanks be to God!
What?
St. Francis de Sales was famous for writing countless pages of advice. He sought to bring help and comfort to everyday people. If he were alive today, he would certainly have much to say about COVID-19.
One of St. Francis’s favorite pieces of advice was to embrace your current situation. He believed that anything, even incredibly challenging trials, could serve to make you a better and happier person. “The many troubles in your household will tend to your edification,” the saint writes, “if you strive to bear them all in gentleness, patience, and kindness.” By choosing an attitude that is accepting and charitable, our troubles will be easier to bear, and could even become a blessing.
St. Francis believed that God does not use struggle just to make us miserable, but rather to bring about a later good. "God never permits anything to come upon us as a trial or test of our virtue without desiring that we should profit by it." Or, to quote the modern fount of wisdom Kelly Clarkson, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!”
I’m tempted to roll my eyes at these sayings. They seem overly simple, insensitive, and unrealistic. How could practicing patience and kindness, which require so much effort, make an objectively hard situation any easier? Maybe I can admit that the struggles of my past have made me a stronger person, but how does that help me endure the current challenges? Living through a pandemic may make me stronger someday, but how do I deal with it now?
As I read more of St. Francis’s writings, I’m struck by how he condemns my doubts and fears. "Anxiety and fear do not provide solace for our pain but aggravate it, leading us to a kind of breakdown in courage and strength because it appears that our pain has no possible remedy." These words are deceptively obvious. Mourning the situation, fearing the situation, or fretting over what cannot be helped truly only makes matters worse. Why not look for a reason to be joyful? My negative feelings will not end the virus—I’m only exacerbating my own suffering.
But again, I ask: How? Do I just ignore reality? How do I put on a mask, and then mask how I feel about it? Finally, I realized.
Gratitude.
If I refocus my attention on everything I have to be thankful for, it becomes so much easier to be kind, patient, and joyful amidst sickness and strife--and I’m convinced that St. Francis would agree. So, I can rewrite my first paragraph:
I have a lot of work to do, which is so refreshing after a long quarantine. Zoom is finicky, but I still get to do my job. I can’t see anyone’s face, but I’ve learned to smile with my eyes. I get to catch up with friends outdoors. Sure, I miss my favorite restaurant, but my dinner plate is always full. The atmosphere reeks of fear, but Mass and the sacraments are finally available again.
Thanks be to God!
I’m not being naïve. I’m not ignoring the mask. But by naming and giving thanks for the positives that persist, I can let my heart be at peace. As St. Francis de Sales teaches, stewing over potential sufferings helps nobody.
“It is quite enough to receive the evils which do come upon us from time to time without anticipating them by imagination.”
So, let us be thankful that we are here, focus on the task at hand, and trust that we will emerge stronger and better people. This is what Francis would do.
Genevieve O’Connor
DeSales University Student ‘22
Oblates Social Media Intern
