A Salesian Spirituality of Imperfection

As human beings we are more alike than we are different.  One characteristic we all share is that each of us, at some point in our lives, has made a mistake and, despite our good will and intentions, will probably continue to make them.

Saint Francis de Sales was aware of this.  In fact, he said that the spiritual life itself is comprised largely of mistakes because it is in our mistakes that we realize our own humanity, our own limits, and our need for God.  He writes, “We must never be astonished at finding ourselves imperfect…because there is no cure for it.”  Saint Francis asks us to acknowledge something we’d often rather avoid; namely, that as humans we are not, and will not be, perfect.  Instead, we must ask ourselves how we respond to our mistakes. 

Do we:

• Take the time to learn from them or dismiss them?

• Take responsibility when it is our fault or blame others?

• Do we work to correct it or resort to self-pity?

• Are we honest and accountable or do we play the victim?

Finally, Saint Francis also reminds us that after every mistake there is one thing we must do: pick ourselves up and continue moving forward as Jesus did when carrying the cross to Calvary.  During that walk Jesus was physically battered, emotionally drained, and going through physical upheaval.  Yet, after each fall, Jesus picked Himself up and continued going forward and persevered until He reached His destination.  How did He do it?  First, Jesus was supported through His prayer, His constant communication with the Father who loved Him and was with Him during His suffering.  Second, Jesus was supported by His friends who met Him on the way like His mother Mary, Mary Magdalene and the Beloved Disciple, John. 

Sometimes we can feel this way too: like we are carrying the weight of the world as we go through our days.  And the tools that Jesus used, prayer and friendship, we ought to use too.  By prayer we share our most intimate needs, desires, hopes, dreams and fears with God.  We ask God to be with us on the way.  And in friendship, we become closer to the people who will walk with us during our successes and our mistakes. 

When it comes to rising from our mistakes, let’s: 

• Recognize our mistakes (our imperfections)

• Take responsibility for their consequences

• Pray & patiently try to change ourselves to avoid making them

• Tell others what we are doing

• Persevere in making the needed adjustments as we try and try again

As Saint Francis advises, “Perfection consists in fighting against our imperfections…In this enterprise, we must have courage and patience…in this…we are always victorious provided we are willing to fight.”  In other words, we fail only when we fall and decide to remain down.  We are perfect when we fall and then rise again, trusting in God’s love and mercy, and determined to change and do better.

May God be praised!

Father Michael Newman, OSFS

Pastor

Holy Family Parish, Adrian, MI

The Immaculate Conception

“Every ‘yes’ is God’s coming into the world.”

My dad retired from the grocery store Kroger’s about 10 years ago after spending almost 45 years working there in the grocery and dairy departments.  After he retired he got bored so he decided to volunteer at our local parish in Toledo, OH. Not long after, the church secretary called him and said, “We have a parishioner in his 40s who has a wife and children.  And he just became a quadriplegic.  He can’t move his arms or legs.  Could you please go visit him once a week, take communion to him, and pray with him?”

My dad asked for some time to think about it.  He talked to my mom about it.  He prayed about it.

And he said, “I knew in my heart that I had to help others.”  And so he said, “yes” and he went to visit this man, and he still visits him to this very day.

As we celebrate the Immaculate Conception today and hear the Gospel of the Annunciation, I keep thinking about the “yes” that my dad said a few years ago and the “yes” that Mary said over 2000 years ago to the angel Gabriel in Nazareth.  Just like Mary, when my dad said “yes” to visiting this man, Christ came into the world.  Every “yes” to God’s call is an incarnation of Jesus Christ.

He takes on flesh (that’s what incarnation means) in our lives through love and service. Saint Francis de Sales called this “Living Jesus.”

Mother Marie de Sales Chappuis, VHM, who taught Salesian Spirituality to Blessed Louis Brisson, OSFS, called it “the Way.”  She said that, when we say “yes” to God’s call, then God re-incarnates Himself into the world in and through us.  Our feet become God’s feet.  Our hands become God’s hands.  We become what Mary is, a “God-bearer” for when we say “yes” to what God asks of us. Christ comes into the world again and again through us.

Today we celebrate the Immaculate Conception of Mary and that she was conceived without Original Sin.  Mary had a privileged role in bringing Jesus into the world. Through our baptism, we too are freed from Original Sin and have a privileged role in bringing Jesus into the world.

And what does Mary do throughout her life? She leads us to Jesus. She says “yes” to the call to welcome Christ into her life and bring him to those who need him in this world.

We, like Mary and my dad, are called to do the same.

May God be praised!

Father Michael Newman, OSFS

Pastor

Holy Family Parish

Adrian, MI

Unmasked

This Halloween we had our usual share of trick-or-treaters at the parish rectory, knocking on the door and chanting in that sing-song way, “Trick or treat!”  It’s amazing to me that Halloween is now the second most popular holiday for adults in the United States (Christmas is still the first).  Yet, at the same time, Halloween is the one holiday where we don’t celebrate who we really are.  Instead, we put on masks and go door to door begging for treats, we disguise ourselves in order to get something good.

In a sense, this is a metaphor for real life.  How many of us disguise ourselves every day by putting on “masks” at home or at work in order to get what we think is good?  How many of us wear “masks,” that is, behave or do things that we believe will make us feel affirmed and liked; powerful and in control; secure and safe?  How many times do we get what we need by wearing masks?

If we are honest, it can be difficult to be ourselves.  It can be hard to freely express your own opinion or thoughts for fear of what others might say or think.  If you are in a restaurant and publicly pray over your food, some people may look at you as if they have seen a monster and, for some of us, that public shaming or disapproval is more frightening than anything we saw at our doors Halloween night.

The poet E.E. Cummings said it best, “To be nobody but yourself in a world that is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody but yourself — means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight — and never stop fighting.”

That’s why it’s great that the Church celebrates the Feast of All Saints right after Halloween.  All Saints Day is really the feast of those who took their masks off and lived lives free of artificiality and pretense.  All Saints Day celebrates the many different men and women over the centuries who became holy by taking the words of Saint Francis de Sales to heart, “Be who you are and be that well in order to give glory to God, the Master Craftsman whose masterpiece you are.”

We too can be saints.  We too are called to follow Saint Francis de Sales’ teaching and become holy.  We can live our lives without our masks.  All we need to do is approach the door of God’s love every day, acknowledge our sinfulness and respond to God’s mercy and grace. This invites us to take our masks off, humbly knock at God’s door as we are, and lovingly accept God’s “treats” — the grace and love He offers daily to us.

May God be praised!

Father Michael Newman, OSFS

Pastor

Holy Family Parish

Adrian, MI