Prepare the Way of the Lord!

The ministry of that strange, eccentric but intriguing character, John the Baptist, always highlights the second Sunday of Advent.  His voice and ministry fulfill Isaiah’s prophecy of the one who prepares the way of the Lord.

For me the ministry of John underlines a fundamental characteristic of Christian discipleship.  His was a fiery voice that spared no feelings.  He saw his task in simple and direct terms:  to lead people to conversion in the purifying waters of the Jordan, thereby readying them for the coming Messiah.

He did what needed to be done and said what needed to be said at that time and place to prepare and smooth the way for others to Jesus.  That’s our task as well.

Faith in Jesus is continually bombarded by obstacles on the road of life.  As just the latest example of such obstacles, whose faith in Jesus as provident and caring has not been shaken at least a little by the harmful effects of the Covid-19 pandemic on the health, finances, relationships and so much more of so many people? 

Health and age-related issues, strained relationships, hurtful words, broken promises –things like these are bumps on the road to Jesus for all of us at one time or another.

At those times we need a John the Baptist to help smooth the road for us with a kind word, a helping hand, a ready shoulder or just a friendly presence.  Those little kindnesses are, at those moments, the face, the hands, the heart and the presence of Jesus for us.

But we too need to become John the Baptist for others as well, doing whatever we can to lessen the pain, shore up the faith, heal the hurt or just be a friendly presence in the life and faith of others.

Jesus welcomed the preparations that John made to smooth the way for others to encounter him as Messiah and Lord. 

The voice and the ministry of the Baptist have now been entrusted to us.  During these brief but hectic weeks of Advent, let’s do our best in largely small but truly helpful ways to smooth the road for others and help prepare them for the coming of the Lord!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial
Wilmington-Philadelphia Province

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

St. Francis de Sales: Counting Our Blessings on Thanksgiving

Growing up, our parents told my siblings and me to “count your blessings before you go to sleep.” They also made sure we watched Bing Crosby and Rosemary Clooney as they sang “Count Your Blessings (Instead of Sheep)” in the popular film White Christmas. The messages at home, in school, and at mass were consistent - find the good, count your blessings.

Thanksgiving seems the appropriate day to count blessings and find the good in our lives. This year, as our holiday traditions have been interrupted by a worldwide pandemic and many of us are missing loved ones at the table or mourning those taken from us, counting blessings may be a bit challenging.

In articles, family conversations, and in homilies, we have been told that despite its challenges, this year has been lined with blessings: more time with family, introspective reflections on life, flexible work situations; but for some, those blessings are not so obvious.

As we face today’s holiday, we may be thinking of who was with us last year or what traditions we were practicing. Our focus may be on counting all we have lost and what is missing rather than counting what is present in our lives.

My list of what I miss includes my sister in law’s amazing turkey, my brothers’ arguments over politics and football (the same noise I also complained about last year), hours of board games, and crazed Black Friday shopping. My day today will be limited to just my immediate family and we will struggle as we find new ways to celebrate. 

I feel lost and the blessings do not roll off my tongue as quickly as they normally do.  During these times, I force myself to focus on what St. Francis de Sales wrote:

“Do not think that you will be able to succeed in your affairs by your own efforts, but only by the assistance of God; and on setting out, consign yourself to His care, believing that He will do that which will be best for you.”

 And so again, I try to heed Francis’ words. I will try to remember today that I am never alone and that if I listen closely, God will help me count my blessings.

Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep by Bing Crosby

Paula M. Riley
Communications Consultant
Paula M. Riley LinkedIn

Advent and the Practice of the Salesian “Little Virtues”

Next week the Season of Advent begins, the short four-week period during which we prepare for the liturgical Celebration of the Birth of Jesus.

It is a good time to rededicate ourselves to prayer, sacraments, the practice of virtue and the corporal and spiritual works of mercy.

For most of us, however, the spiritual practices of the liturgical Season of Advent are always in great competition with the many pressures, pulls and tugs of the holiday season.

This is when we would do well to heed the sound spiritual advice of Meister Eckhart and St. Francis de Sales. 

Francis advises in his Introduction to the Devout Life,

“let us try sincerely, humbly, and devoutly to acquire those little virtues whose conquest our Savior has set forth as the end of our care and labor.  Such are patience, meekness, self-mortification, humility, obedience, poverty, chastity, tenderness toward our neighbors, bearing with their imperfections, diligence and holy fervor” (Part 3, chapter 2). 

Three hundred years before Francis, Meister Eckhart gave very similar advice: “…In doing good, it does not matter if I apply it to small or great things, because there is no difference between a drop and the sea.”

Busy people, stressed people, harried people --which most of us are during the holidays-- may want to do many and great things in order to better themselves spiritually but they must often learn to be content doing few and little things with “great love,” as  Francis writes elsewhere.

With the pandemic still with us in so many ways, these weeks of Advent will be especially stressful.  Daily life under these circumstances will provide you and me with countless opportunities to be patient, gentle and forgiving; tender toward those (who are often nearest to us) whose imperfections and shortcomings can be particularly irksome at a time of great stress and fatigue. 

In the busyness of the coming weeks, let us be content with attending to the “drops” of which Meister Eckhart writes but with the “great love” that Francis urges.

God be Praised!

For the past month, we have had weekly postings on Facebook about each of the The Little Virtues, by St. Francis de Sales.  To find out more, click here.

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial
Wilmington-Philadelphia Province

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

An Oblate Mother’s Lesson in Generosity

November is a time when we honor our deceased in the Catholic Church.  Recently, my family honored the anniversary of my Mom’s death. At the same time, our nation is struggling to cope with the ever-growing count of coronavirus   deaths. These deaths were persons once loved just like my mother. 

Like them, my mom once laughed, loved, hugged, cried, cooked, and is sadly missed.  Suddenly, those who lost loved ones to Covid-19, their grief, their loss, and their emptiness came tumbling down on me and I felt first-hand their sorrow and pain.  Death is so permanent and disruptive to family life.

I still think of my mom, but her memory now brings a slight smile to my face, because I remember something she said or achieved that is unforgettable.  Here is one noteworthy memory, but first a little background.

As a twelve-year-old Italian immigrant, my mom arrived with this maxim engraved on her heart: Share what you can. Meaning matters more than your gift. She believed enthusiastically that opportunities often surfaced buried gifts.

My mom’s story begins just after I left home to enter the Oblates’ seminary and my father started his company.  As with all new companies, financial struggles followed.  The Oblates at that time decided to add an addition to the building that was my new home.

My parents felt obligated to help but had few resources to do something. My mother’s timely maxim came to play: Share what you can. Meaning matters more than your gift.

Since a monetary gift was impossible, my mother’s creativity came alive. She would sell her spaghetti sauce.  My mom was definitely a fine cook, but she wondered, could she do this?  And so, her great adventure began. She gathered extended family and friends and their friends to buy her sauce prepared for Easter dinner at $2.00 per jar.

Soon the house hummed with activity, my two sisters, aunts, friends worked to prepare her recipe.  They feverishly bottled her special sauce into two hundred jars.  When Palm Sunday arrived, the jars were ready for delivery.  Meanwhile, the limited supply and my mom’s story spread, and so did demand for her coveted sauce.

In her grandson’s red wagon, she delivered the jars in our neighborhood.  My aunts and uncles used their cars to handle the rest.  She sold all 200 jars and with donations she collected over $1,000.  Although it wasn’t enough to complete the building, her generosity and her spirit helped others pitch in and donate.

This story about my mom still makes me smile. And yes, opportunities do often surface buried gifts.  We simply need to supply our time and energy to do the digging.  The results may seem small.  However, small gifts often take up the most room in our hearts. My mom’s fervor did that in retelling the story, then and even now.  She lives through this story and embodied the teaching of St. Francis de Sales when he said, “We will not often have the opportunity to do great things, but every day, we will have the opportunity to do little things with great love.”

We all have gifts and opportunities which can give life and love.  Soon we will hear the inspired stories arising from loved ones who succumbed to the corona virus.  Their telling will put a smile on your face, life to their memory, and inspiration to all who listen. My mom’s still does!

Share what you can. Meaning matters more than your gift!

God be Praised.

Fr. Richard DeLillio, OSFS

Jesus Christ the King!

Next Sunday is the solemnity of Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of the Universe. The Gospel reading is from Matthew, chapter 25, verses 31-46.  The scene is the solemn judgment at the end of history.

Jesus comes from the heavens and sits on his glorious throne, accompanied by his angels.  All nations are gathered before him, each man and woman waiting for a final judgment on the conduct of their lives.

I love what follows.  Nothing is asked about one’s accomplishments in life, nor how rich or poor, successful or unsuccessful, male or female, single or married or any other measure or standard that we might have envisioned. 

The only measure by which we will be judged by our King is the measure of love, not its feeling, but its expression in concrete deeds to real people in need.  The response of Jesus in verse 40 to those judged worthy of heaven says it all:  ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me’.

Jesus lists all sorts of good deeds, feeding the hungry and thirsty, clothing the naked, welcoming the stranger, visiting the imprisoned, and so on.  The list is no way meant to be exhaustive.

The Good Samaritan came across a beaten and near-dead man.  He cared for him in a very concrete way that met that man’s needs at that moment.  There was no thought about the man not being a fellow Samaritan, nor any consideration of whether he deserved the beating he had received.  The only consideration was the demand of love for another human being in need, full stop.  At this time in our history, the guidance of the Holy Spirit has brought the Church and us to the awareness that “neighbor” includes our fragile and threatened planet.

That parable is a paradigm for all Christian behavior and how we are meant to meet every moment of life.  No matter who on the path of life we encounter in whatever need, we are to stop and address, to best of our means and ability, that concrete need.  It’s really as simple as that.

Our King will judge you and me to the extent that we were able to see his face on the faces of all those we meet on the road of life.  Those may be faces of family and friends; they may be faces of strangers and even enemies.  No matter: “As you did it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me.”

The beautiful feast of the Jesus the King is really the gospel summary of love’s double commandment.  We love God and, thus, fulfill the first commandment, when and to the extent that we love in a concrete and hands-on manner God’s people at every moment of life and in every circumstance, large and small! 

So, stop fretting so much about the end.  Just live and love well today, and everyday!

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial
Wilmington-Philadelphia Province

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Parable of the Talents

Andrey Mironov, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

Next Sunday’s Gospel relates the Parable of the Talents.  At the time of Jesus one talent was an enormous sum of money, worth more than fifteen years’ wages!  Imagine entrusting 15 or 30 or 75 years of wages of your hard-earned money into the hands of your employees as you set off on a long journey!  Yet, that is what the man does in the Gospel reading next Sunday.   

And that is exactly what Jesus has done for each of us as well.  Jesus has gone on a very long journey, entrusting his Church and each of us with all sorts of precious gifts: faith, scripture, sacraments, the double commandment of love and the example of Jesus and the saints, as well as our own unique gifts, graces and talents.

We are those servants in Sunday’s Gospel.  The question is this: Will we be as generous in sharing our gifts with others as Jesus has been in sharing his gifts with us?

The reading from Proverbs in next Sunday’s reading gives us the beautiful example of a wife and mother who used her gifts exceedingly well.  Her husband has entrusted his heart to his wife and she, in turn, “brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life.”  The reading describes the many things that this large-hearted woman does to enhance the wellbeing of her husband and children, while extending her selfless love even beyond kith and hearth as she “reaches out her hands to the poor and extends her arms to the needy.”

If she were one of the servants in today’s Gospel, how delighted her Master would be that she has used so well and so generously the gifts and talents that he had entrusted to her! 

The point of the readings from Proverbs and Matthew’s gospel speaks directly to each of us.  We are spouses, parents, and children. We are neighbors and citizens. We are colleagues, students, best friends and relatives.  Each of our many roles comes with responsibilities to fulfill and with opportunities for the generous practice of virtue and the courageous witness to Christian values.  For St. Francis de Sales we are all challenged to “… be who we are and be that well in order to give glory to the Master Craftsman whose handiwork we are.”

If we live out our lives in that manner, when Jesus returns, we will hear from him the words that we all long to hear from him on that day:  “Well done, my good and faithful servant.  Well done!”

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial
Wilmington/Philadelphia Province
Oblates of St. Francis de Sales

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Seeking Salesian Authenticity in Quiet Moments

We find a model of authenticity in the life and ministry of Jesus.  Wherever he went, Jesus attracted people because there was something trustworthy about him, something in his manner and message that touched people’s hearts.  We are called to be authentic whatever our state in life.  We need to know who we are and to be that perfectly well.   One way to achieve this goal is found in the “power of purpose.” 

In his book The Power of Purpose, Richard Leider wrote:  “Purpose is that deepest dimension within us—our central core or essence—where we have profound sense of who we are, where we came from, and where we’re going.  Purpose is the quality we choose to shape our lives around.  Purpose is a source of energy and direction” (p. 1).  Indeed, when life becomes most challenging, we need a sense of meaning and purpose to provide us with the energy and direction that can help us sustain ourselves.  But, what can provide us with the sense of purpose we need?

One primary source of purpose is service to others that is driven by an altruistic spirit.  For those who might question the realism of prescribing altruistic service as a valuable source of finding meaningful purpose in our seemingly self-centered world, a creative perspective on the subject was proposed years ago.  The well-known author Hans Seyle, in his classic writings on human stress, coined the term “altruistic egoism.”  Seyle argued that by helping others (altruism) and “earning their love” while at the same time recognizing our own needs and enhancing ourselves (egoism) we can enjoy a rewarding lifestyle, free of disabling stress.  Consequently, according to Seyle, it is only through marrying this “self-centered: nature with altruistic efforts to win the goodwill of others, that a happy meaningful life will result.  Get out of yourself!   The best way to do this is find some concrete ways to give my time to help others in need.  In other words, how can I serve others with my time and talent, not just my treasure?   However, Francis de Sales tells us that before we can give ourselves to others, we ought to take the time to Be Still.

In the Salesian tradition, the spiritual life takes the inside-out approach.  For DeSales, time every day for quiet is essential if we are to attend to what is going on inside effectively.   Silence is not equated to the absence of noise, though it presumes so.  Silence is rather an inner space for heart-to-heart communing with God, often possible even in the midst of simple and psychically undemanding chores.

Silence can help us become centered, calm, introspective, and perhaps even wise.  It offers us a valuable treasure – it provides the opportunity for us to listen to ourselves. The opportunities for this kind of presence to God in silence are more frequent than we perhaps realize.  How about those times we are waiting in line at a store?  What about those few moments after lunch and before the afternoon routine begins?  What about the drive to and from work?  Silence can help us become centered, calm, introspective, and perhaps even wise. 

When we speak it is difficult to learn more than we already know.  But when we silently listen to what others have to say, whole new worlds are available to us.  We can begin to understand things from the perspectives of others, and we can have access to what they know that we don’t.    As we listen to the concerns and opinions of others, we are freed, for a time, from worrying about our own self-focused problems and we can learn about what it would be like in someone else’s circumstances.  Silent listening holds the key to a fuller, more informed, and empathetic experience of life, and then we can authentically serve them.

God be Praise!
Fr. Edward Ogden, OSFS
Parochial Vicar, St. Thomas the Apostle Parish
Glen Mills, PA

Contagious: Treating COVID-19 Fear with Salesian Hope

So much of what is going on in the world is unknown, and out of our control, which sometimes is difficult for me to accept. I am a person who likes to have a plan for everything. Not only a Plan A, but often a Plan B and C as well. This pandemic has reminded me of how little control I have. While I cannot control the circumstances of the virus and the related disruptions, I can control my reaction to them.

It is so easy to go down a rabbit hole of fear and get drawn into a panic. We should not live our lives in fear and view the world through a negative lens. Focusing on negatives and living in fear is not going to change circumstances; it only makes you and those around you feel worse and often leads to negative habits. Positivity, on the other hand, is just as contagious. As St. Francis de Sales states, “It is wonderful how attractive a gentle, pleasant manner is, and how much it wins hearts.” By leading with gentleness and humility, we can brace this storm together in a much more productive way. If we focus on positives and the things which we can control, we feel better and make those around us stronger. 

I am a wife, mother of two wonderful boys, and a physician assistant. I have found people seeking my opinion on health matters has increased throughout this pandemic. While we do not know all of the specifics about the virus or what treatment options are going to be the best in the long term, I have found the most effective advice I have given has been to heed suggested medical protocols and maintain a perspective on the positives.

Focusing on the extra time with family, self-reflection, maintaining/reconnecting with your faith can change the way we approach each day. It does not take a medical license to provide hope to those around us; this is something we all can do. We have a choice; we can choose fear over hope or hope over fear. Let’s choose hope!

Melissa Brown,  MSPAS, PA-C
DeSales University
Assistant Professor, Physician Assistant Program

November: The Month of Happy Souls

Among Catholics, November is often referred to as the month of the “Poor Souls,” the time when we remember and pray for all those who have gone before us in death but who have not yet attained their final happiness, heaven.

As I see it, next to being in heaven, our next greatest happiness is to be a “poor soul” or, better, a “happy soul,” that is, someone who is assured of one day being with God forever.

I understand the reason for the expression, “Poor Souls.”   At death we experience “particular judgement.” Based on how we have lived our lives, we are judged to be worthy of heaven, hell or purgatory.  Unless one is a saint or a martyr at death, I would guess that most of us will find ourselves not yet ready for heaven and, thank God, not deserving of hell.  That leaves Purgatory.

For me, Pope Emeritus Benedict best describes the meaning of Purgatory. For him, the souls in Purgatory are “poor” only in one sense: having seen at death the ineffably beautiful face of God, they now long to be with God forever.  This will happen for them in time, but for now they are not quite ready for that blessed joy.

As Pope Emeritus Benedict puts it, they still need “to be put right.” Being “put right” is a very helpful way of understanding what is meant by “Purgatory.”  The “poor souls” are being prepared for eternal happiness with God and with all the Saints, including their family and friends who are now with God or who will one day be with God. In the comforting words of Wisdom, the Blessed are now in the hands of God and at peace. Having been tested, the have been proved worthy.  In but an interval, the “happy souls” in Purgatory will finally and fully be “put right” as well.  Then they will be ready to join the saints in glory.

So, for me, the month of November is better understood as the month of “Happy Souls,” for they have the “blessed assurance” for which we all long: union with God forever!

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial
Wilmington/Philadelphia Province
Oblates of St. Francis de Sales

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

A Salesian All Souls Day

For the past ten years, when the calendar hits March 20, my four school-aged kids and I send a balloon into the sky.  This is how we celebrate, what we call, “the day Aunt Mary Beth went to heaven.”  My kids were very young when my sister died at 47.  Though pictures and stories tell them she lived a good life, this tradition is telling as well.  The balloon (since replaced with more environmentally friendly flower petals) is specifically designed to be celebratory because when my kids think about Mary Beth’s death, I don’t want them to wonder about her suffering, but rather to remember what St. Francis de Sales once wrote:

“Let us walk … joyously, dear souls, among the difficulties of this passing life … These pains will have an end when our life ends, after which there will be only joy, only contentment, only eternal consolation.”

Joy, contentment, eternal consolation. Thus, the celebration.

Before we celebrate those who have gone before us, we must pray for them.  All Souls Day offers us a special opportunity for this prayer.  And, with all the death in our pandemic world today, prayer is what these departed need most.

As a child, I remember the day Sr. Kathleen made my fourth grade class stand as the list of deceased alumni was read over the PA system. It was All Souls Day, and she told us to pray for these souls so they could get into heaven. I recall imagining a large gate with people waiting in line to get inside. Later, in my high school theology class, my teacher explained purgatory - but I still had questions.

After experiencing the deaths of loved ones as an adult, I appreciate that understanding the concept of purgatory relies directly on faith.  Our faith tells us that through the mercy of God, we can all experience external life, but first, sins need to be purged. 

This is where WE come in.

Through the prayers of the faithful, that is us here on Earth, these dead are cleansed of sins and enter heaven.  For this, we must pray.  On All Souls Day, we offer such prayers.

Whether you have your own Aunt Mary Beth, whose loss breaks your heart, whether Covid death has touched your home or whether no one comes to mind on this day of reflection, we can ALL pray.  When we do, we offer the deceased the best gift we can give them.

My fourth-grade image of those pearly gates has been modified. I no longer see a waiting line. Now, I imagine those left on Earth offering a gentle push as we send these souls to a life of joy, contentment, and eternal consolation or, from my children’s perspective, an endless party with lots and lots of balloons!

Paula M. Riley
Communications Consultant
Paula M. Riley LinkedIN

Provincial’s Reflection: The Feast of All Saints

The Irish poet John O’Donohue writes this intriguing sentence: “The horizon is in the well.”  The horizon is that beautiful far-off distant view to which we often look when searching for ultimate answers. But rarely do those answers come.  The well, on the other hand, is that deep inner depth of our spirit that we tend to avoid for fear that we will find nothing there. But the truth is otherwise. For each of us is a precious mystery of life with our own unique character, personality and spirit -- each with our own special and valuable story to tell.

When Jesus stood before the crowds to preach, he did not tell them to go searching over some distant rainbow in order to find answers to life’s mysteries and challenges. He reminded them of how blessed, how precious, they already are if they only have eyes to see.  He saw his ministry as one of opening our eyes to the beauty of our own self and to the grace that lives deep within us, a grace just waiting to be stirred into life.  It is when the look of love falls upon us that the grace within us begins to flower.  It is then that we can grasp just has truly lovely we really us.  In the end, it is love –the love of God in Christ—that brings the grace within us to life!

What we will be in the future we do not yet fully know, but one thing is clear already.  The more we look upon the face of Christ, the more we will come to resemble him in both his tender love of God and in his foot-washing love of others.  We will then be like him, able to say of ourselves what St. Paul once said of himself: “I live now, not I.  Christ lives in me!”  Such was the case of every saint whom we honor on this day, both those on the official calendar of saints and those countless other men, women and children who have gone on before us and whose holiness only God knows.  They too are saints.  And because of the grace that is already ours, we too hope one day to be among their number.

One great saint once expressed the relationship between the grace in which we now live and the glory to which we are called in hope in this way: “What is grace but glory in exile? And what is glory but grace in its homeland?”  St. Francis de Sales expressed something similar in this way: “The saints were once what we are now.”  The saints were once mothers and fathers, friends and spouses, children and siblings; they too were doctors, lawyers, soldiers, government employees, housewives and every other relationship, profession or life circumstance. 

Following the good advice of St. Francis de Sales, to one day join the ranks of the saints in glory, let us, now, “be what we are and be that well!” 

By hopeful anticipation, then, the feast of All Saints in our feast day as well.  During these dreaded months of pandemic, isolation, and depravation of all sorts, may we find comfort in this most beautiful and hopeful of Christian feasts! 

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial
Wilmington-Philadelphia Province

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Provincial’s Reflection: Love’s Double Commandment

Next Sunday, the 30th Sunday of Year A, contains, in the reading from Exodus, one of the most beautiful passages in Scripture (20:22-26).  In it, God himself intercedes in the most tender manner for the person who is deprived of his cloak: “If you take your neighbor’s cloak as a pledge, you shall return it to him before sunset; for this cloak of his is the only covering he has for his body. What else has he to sleep in?  If he cries out to me, I will hear him; for I am compassionate.”

Sometimes we think too abstractly about God.  These few lines describe someone who knows very well the vulnerable and fragile condition of a person who sleeps without a warm covering on a cold night.  He will broker no excuse as to why we might feel justified in depriving that poor person of that warm cloak.  I don’t know about you, but those few lines say everything I need to know about my God, the Father of the Lord Jesus.  I want that God to be my God.  He cares for his people.  He speaks the most beautiful truth about himself when he describes himself in these words: “I am compassionate.”

Pope Emeritus Benedict describes scripture’s double commandment of love as “performative language.” For the prophets and Jesus, love is never an abstract concept.  It is always concrete and specific as to person, place and circumstance.  If you come upon a hungry person, love commands that you give that person something to eat.  Did Jesus send the hungry crowds away to find food on their own?  No.  He fed them, leaving his disciples and us an action parable, a concrete example of performative love.  If, like the Good Samaritan, you come upon a person beaten and left for dead on the side of the road, you do whatever is in your power to better his situation.

I remember a discussion with a group of laymen who were studying to become “Sons of St. Francis de Sales.”  They were all professional men, many of whom worked in downtown Washington, DC.  Every day they encountered homeless or down and out people looking for a “hand-out.”  At first the discussion centered on whether helping them was a form of unhealthy enablement.  Did it keep them from seeking employment, and so on?  Finally, one of them said what he did.  He said he simply handed out whatever his means permitted to whomever asked him, leaving it up to God to sort out those other concerns.  His gospel example was the Good Samaritan whom Jesus himself held up as example to his followers.  The Good Samaritan did not ask if the man deserved his help.  He found a fellow human being in need and simply helped him in very concrete ways.

This week will present every one of us with countless opportunities to practice “performative love,” especially during this stubborn pandemic. We are commanded to love, both God and neighbor, with “neighbor” understood in the broadest possible manner. Let us love as the compassionate God asks us to love in Exodus 22 and as Jesus commanded us at the last supper: “As I have done for you, so you are to do for one another.”

Gospel love is concrete, foot washing love!

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

What Would Francis Do?

Work is piling up and Zoom is malfunctioning. We can’t see anyone’s face, our friends are not allowed to visit our homes, our favorite restaurants are closed, and the atmosphere reeks of fear.

Thanks be to God!

What?

St. Francis de Sales was famous for writing countless pages of advice.  He sought to bring help and comfort to everyday people. If he were alive today, he would certainly have much to say about COVID-19.

One of St. Francis’s favorite pieces of advice was to embrace your current situation. He believed that anything, even incredibly challenging trials, could serve to make you a better and happier person. “The many troubles in your household will tend to your edification,” the saint writes, “if you strive to bear them all in gentleness, patience, and kindness.” By choosing an attitude that is accepting and charitable, our troubles will be easier to bear, and could even become a blessing.

St. Francis believed that God does not use struggle just to make us miserable, but rather to bring about a later good.  "God never permits anything to come upon us as a trial or test of our virtue without desiring that we should profit by it." Or, to quote the modern fount of wisdom Kelly Clarkson, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!”

I’m tempted to roll my eyes at these sayings. They seem overly simple, insensitive, and unrealistic. How could practicing patience and kindness, which require so much effort, make an objectively hard situation any easier? Maybe I can admit that the struggles of my past have made me a stronger person, but how does that help me endure the current challenges? Living through a pandemic may make me stronger someday, but how do I deal with it now?

As I read more of St. Francis’s writings, I’m struck by how he condemns my doubts and fears. "Anxiety and fear do not provide solace for our pain but aggravate it, leading us to a kind of breakdown in courage and strength because it appears that our pain has no possible remedy." These words are deceptively obvious. Mourning the situation, fearing the situation, or fretting over what cannot be helped truly only makes matters worse. Why not look for a reason to be joyful? My negative feelings will not end the virus—I’m only exacerbating my own suffering.  

But again, I ask: How? Do I just ignore reality? How do I put on a mask, and then mask how I feel about it? Finally, I realized.

Gratitude.

If I refocus my attention on everything I have to be thankful for, it becomes so much easier to be kind, patient, and joyful amidst sickness and strife--and I’m convinced that St. Francis would agree. So, I can rewrite my first paragraph:

I have a lot of work to do, which is so refreshing after a long quarantine. Zoom is finicky, but I still get to do my job. I can’t see anyone’s face, but I’ve learned to smile with my eyes. I get to catch up with friends outdoors. Sure, I miss my favorite restaurant, but my dinner plate is always full. The atmosphere reeks of fear, but Mass and the sacraments are finally available again.

Thanks be to God!

I’m not being naïve. I’m not ignoring the mask. But by naming and giving thanks for the positives that persist, I can let my heart be at peace. As St. Francis de Sales teaches, stewing over potential sufferings helps nobody.

“It is quite enough to receive the evils which do come upon us from time to time without anticipating them by imagination.”

So, let us be thankful that we are here, focus on the task at hand, and trust that we will emerge stronger and better people. This is what Francis would do.

Genevieve O’Connor
DeSales University Student ‘22
Oblates Social Media Intern

The Driving Force of Hope: A Reflection On Baseball and Oblate Religious Life

Why do I keep watching baseball?

This is a question I’ve asked myself often as I’ve followed the Major League Baseball season intently this year, spending much time (perhaps too much time!) following the ups and downs of the playoff race.

Maybe I keep watching because there’s something captivating about the identity of a team; about the continuity of the whole even as individual members come and go through the years.

In following the journey of young ballplayers, many of whom are my own age, I’ve thought about my own journey as part of a “team,” my religious community, the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales.

In the Major League Baseball, a player doesn’t get to choose his team. He doesn’t get to try out for the team he dreamed of playing for as a kid. He doesn’t get to pick the other guys on his team. But, once he’s on the team, even if he knows it may only be for a few months, he gives everything he has to his new team.

In religious life, we too are living a life that we ourselves did not choose without first being chosen. Our life chose us. Or rather, God chose us. We were drafted onto a team not of our own making, some of us when we were 18 years old, others after years of life experience. We didn’t choose our teammates. We didn’t plant the grass upon which we play; we didn’t fashion the wood and leather that are the tools of the trade. The difference between us and the ballplayer is that we’re on the same team for life.

Maybe what’s most difficult about the “game” we play, in comparison to the ballplayer, is that in our day to day life, there’s no visible opponent, there’s no rival in another uniform to get the adrenaline going each day we take the field. Yes, there is real social injustice at multiple levels that needs to be confronted. Yes, personal evil and sin are real. But our everyday life does not always seem to involve a head-on confrontation with them.

Maybe, it’s also the case that for a baseball team that takes the field, the adversary is not the other team on the field.  Maybe the adversary, the true rival, is also one we must face as religious: the temptation to let go of hope. The cold pessimism masquerading as realism that says there’s only a 1-in-30 shot at the postseason, or at, best 1-in-15, so why bother? Why not just show up and just aim to finish ahead of the last-place team?

We know that in the life of any team, celebrations can be short-lived. The smiles of a playoff-clinching walk-off replaced a week later by the choking back of tears as your team’s ace gets pummeled in an elimination game. The experts’ applause of your team’s grittiness succeeded by analysis of the manager’s head-scratching pitching change. In our life, I’m sure we’ve often felt very much the same: the high notes of graduations, baptisms, weddings, ordinations and professions are just as frequently followed up by funerals, boring Zoom calls, petty gossip, and the humdrum of the everyday.

So why does the ballplayer keep playing then, and why do we Oblates keep playing the game?

I believe it’s something elegantly simple called hope.

Hope: That indescribable, invigorating, infuriating something within you that tells you to go up and take the field again even though you got blown out 15-1 yesterday, to step in the batter’s box when his changeup is at 90 miles per hour and his fastball is in triple digits. The something that says “heck with it” to the statistical projections and gets a hit against a pitcher who’s dominated every single appearance before.

It’s that same something that drives us Oblates to preach the Gospel when we wonder if anyone is listening, to show up for morning prayer when all we want is more sleep, to love each other and learn from each other when we’ve known each other since high school and think we’ve got each other all figured out.

I’d like to end on a chipper note, saying that we have both a sturdy array of experience and a “talented young core” here in the Oblates. But as I’ve learned, it’s neither experience nor talent that defines us as religious. It’s the fidelity, the willingness to show up to the chapel, to the parish council meeting, to the classroom each day when we feel that our talent tank is empty and we’re running on fumes like an overworked bullpen. And to still give it our best shot, even when we feel that our best isn’t our best.

We’re all on this team together. Let’s play ball.

Joseph McDaniel, OSFS
Seminarian
Oblates of St. Francis de Sales

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Provincial’s Reflection: The 9th Promise of the Sacred Heart to St. Margaret Mary

The Church celebrates the feast of St. Margaret Mary this week (October 16) and concludes a year of celebration in honor of the 100th anniversary of the canonization of the saint known as “The Apostle of the Sacred Heart.”

A few years ago, someone related a true story that made me stand up and take particular notice of one of the twelve promises that the Sacred Heart made to St. Margaret Mary.  The 9th promise reads, “I will bless every place in which an image of my Heart is exposed and honored.”

The story goes like this.  In Paris late in the 19 century, there lived a very devout woman who had a special devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus.  She begged her non-believing husband for permission to hang a picture of the Sacred Heart in their home, but again and again he stubbornly refused her.  She did not give up.  Finally, angry and exasperated by her persistence, he yielded.

One day years later, the husband, suffering from severe depression, threw himself into the Seine and drowned.  The wife was inconsolable because she felt that the gates of heaven would be closed to him.  Months later, she made a journey to the celebrated parish priest and later saint, John Vianney.  She intended to confess to this holy man.  For hours she remained outside his confessional, weeping quietly, not sure what to say to him.  Eventually, he came out of his confessional and sat beside her.  After a few moments, she told him about her husband’s death and her concern for his eternal salvation.

The saint assured her that during the brief interval between jumping from the bridge and hitting the water her husband had received the grace of conversion and was indeed saved.  His permission to hang a picture of the Sacred Heart in their home, though made with great reluctance and considerable cynicism, nevertheless merited the reward of the 9th Promise. 

This story underscores for me the incredible and loving mercy of Jesus which he expressed so powerfully in these words during his third appearance to St. Margaret Mary:  “Behold this Heart which has loved mankind so much that it has spared nothing, even to exhausting and consuming itself, in order to testify to its love!”

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

The Simplicity and Strength of Salesian Motivational Quotes

Over the years, I have collected quotes from a variety of sources. Whenever I come across one, I write it down (well, type it in my phone). I keep them and turn to them whenever I need a little motivation or a reminder of those things that are important to me. Having spent the last 15 years as a member of the DeSales University faculty, five more as a student or staff member, and four years at a Salesian high school, it probably comes as no surprise that some of those quotes come from St. Francis de Sales.

The part that I have always found most challenging (by this I mean, I am left with no excuse) about St. Francis de Sales is the simplicity of his message. When I read his words, I understand them. I know what he means, and, in almost all cases, I am able to quickly identify moments in my life where those words apply to me.

For example, I do not know when I collected this one, but it is one that I have reflected on often over the last five or six months, “It is a fact that people are always well aware of what is due them. Unfortunately, they remain oblivious of what they owe others.” I am sure that, like me, you have had moments over the last several months where you were angry that you had to miss out on something that you “deserved.”  Taking just a few minutes to read and reflect upon these words has helped me maintain a sense of humility by recognizing all that I am still able to do because of other people.

Another St. Francis de Sales quote that I have turned to often reads, “Worry disturbs reason and good judgment and prevents us from doing well the very things we are worried about.” As we spent the summer becoming Ready for Anything, DeSales University’s preparation for a safe campus, I willingly admit I worried I wouldn’t be ready for anything! The truth is, if I continued to allow this worry to remain top of mind, I would not have focused on preparing. However, by taking a few minutes to reflect upon this quote I could refocus my energy on preparing which lead to greater confidence that I would be ready for the days and weeks ahead. Through this time spent preparing, I also developed a deep sense of gratitude for all of those members of our community who helped make this possible.

For me, I have found the strength to move forward each day through reflection on the words of others. My hope for all of you is that you too have a source of strength upon which you are able to rely on when you need a little help.

Martin Brett, Ph.D.
DeSales University
Associate Professor & Chair, Sport Management

Provincial’s Reflection: Invitation to the Wedding Feast

The sumptuous feast on God’s holy mountain or, its variant theme, the festive wedding banquet, was a familiar one in both old and new Testaments.  We see that from this coming Sunday’s first reading from Isaiah and from its Gospel reading according to Matthew.  Whether it was described as feast or wedding banquet, that festive celebration of food, drink and happy fellowship stood for “that Day” when God would bring his creation, his covenant and his people to perfection.   They would gather with him on his holy mountain to enjoy the newness of life that he himself would give them.

It was a day that for many centuries people of faith looked forward to with hope, promise and expectation.  In Sunday’s reading from Isaiah, the long-awaited “Day of the Lord” is still way off in the distant future.  That is why the prophet uses the future tense to speak of it.   In contrast, Jesus describes the wedding banquet for which “everything is ready.”  All is prepared and the special day is now at hand.  Thus, in Jesus, promise has become fulfillment.  As Jesus relates the story, the king tells his servants to summon his invited guests to the wedding feast: “Tell those invited: ‘Behold, I have prepared my banquet, my calves and fattened cattle are killed, and everything is ready; come to the feast’.”

Jesus is telling the first hearer of this parable that what the prophets such as Isaiah had long ago foretold and promised about “the Day of the Lord” is now at hand.  Indeed, in his person and preaching, the long-awaited promise of God’s kingdom is now finally present.  The only thing remaining is for us to enter the banquet hall and begin to enjoy the feast that God has prepared for us.

Incredibly and sadly, the majority of Jesus’ contemporaries did not heed his call or accept his invitation. He was, in fact, rejected and crucified and the message of his good news largely ignored. 

But what about you and me who believe in Jesus?  How do we react to his invitation to come to the wedding feast and celebrate the Presence of the living God in our midst?  Do we, for instance, truly believe that Jesus is present upon our altars and that, when we receive Holy Communion, he truly enters into our hearts and becomes an intimate part of our daily lives with others?  Will the way we live with one another and in our world in the coming week really reflect the fact that we have welcomed God into our hearts and into our lives?  Are we different, better, more kind and just?  Are we more caring, giving and decent people because in Jesus the Kingdom of God has come into our midst and, through us, is already active in our world?

Have we put on the wedding garment of justice and love, compassion and forgiveness?  Or –sadly-- do we perhaps live no differently at all, forgetting in daily practice that “that Day” promised by Isaiah is already “this Day” for us?

Let us begin today to live lives that are qualitatively different because we have entered the Lord’s wedding banquet and are now robed with the baptismal garment of faith, hope and love.  Because of those gifts, let us resolve to be a holy leaven in our families as well as in our world of work, school and play.  In short, because “that Day” is for us “this Day,” let us live differently in our own lives and make a difference for the better in the lives of others.

Jesus says to each of us today what he said long ago in Sunday’s Gospel: “Everything is ready; come to the feast!”

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To receive DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Father Bill McCandless, OSFS
Oblate Development

St. Francis de Sales: “Have Patience with All Things.”

Having been a member of the DeSales University community my entire adult life—first as a student, then an employee, and now as faculty—I’ve accumulated my fair share of Salesian paraphernalia. Every morning while I wait for my coffee to brew, I blearily blink at one such piece of paraphernalia hanging on my kitchen bulletin board—a bookmark with a quote from St. Francis de Sales:

“Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections, but instead set about remedying them—every day begin the task anew.”

I’ve found myself thinking on these words often since we went into quarantine back in March and all in-person classes needed to rapidly shift online, especially the first part of the passage: “Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself.” I will be the first to admit that when trying something new, I want to fully understand it and instantly be great at it.  Navigating this brave new world of COVID is no exception. I know how to complete all my daily tasks normally and in-person; I should be able to do so immediately in a virtual space.

I asked my students at the beginning of this semester what they’re great at, and if they were immediately great at these things the first time they tried them. I was answered with heads shaking the obvious “no.” All skills and talents take practice and patience to master, and that was the point of my question. I then realized that I needed to reflect on my answer to my own question—I needed to find patience with myself as I practiced to become better at navigating the cliché “new normal.”

We are about a third of the way through this strange semester, and I have found more patience with myself by remembering that despite the masks, the six feet, and the computer screens, we are all trying to figure this out together and don’t always have the right answers. We are all looking to each other for guidance when we are trying to master newness in every facet of our lives and perhaps forgetting to be patient with ourselves all the while.

I still blearily blink at St. Francis’s words every morning while I wait for my coffee to brew, but now my focus has shifted to the second part of the passage: “Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections…” 
While we may have settled into a new-normal routine, let us remember to practice that all-important patience with ourselves and others. Courage exists in all of us and we can use that courage to embrace and challenge our imperfections, and to remember to begin each day and task anew.

Margaret E. Ayala, MFA
Assistant Professor of Composition and Rhetoric
Director of First Year Writing

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To received DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Father Bill McCandless, OSFS
Oblate Development
wmccandless@oblates.org
Office: 302-656-8529 ext.20

Provincial’s Reflection: Get Behind Me, Satan!

Poor St. Peter!  He has just received very high praise and a new name, “Rock,” for his beautiful profession of faith in Jesus, “You are the Christ, Son of the Living God.” Just two brief verses later, however, Jesus is hurling his harshest criticism at him: “Get behind me, Satan!”

What just happened?

Jesus had just reminded Peter and the other disciples of his impending sufferings and death in Jerusalem.  That was too much for Peter: “God forbid, Lord!  This shall never happen to you.”

As if calling Peter, “Satan,” were not enough, Jesus goes further, naming him a stumbling block to his saving mission: “You are a hindrance to me; for you are not on the side of God, but of men” (Matthew 16: 21-23).

On the human level, Jesus must have found his impending crucifixion just as difficult to embrace as Peter suggests (“on the side of men.”)  Still, since it is God’s will for him as Savior (“on the side of God”), he chooses to continue his journey to Jerusalem and embrace whatever waits for him there.  Just when Jesus most needed the support and encouragement of his friends and disciples, Peter pulls back.

One moment Peter gets it all so right; the next moment he gets it all so wrong!

Still, Peter was humble enough to accept the criticism received and to journey right along with Jesus to Jerusalem.  Would he have preferred another sort of Messiah, not a suffering one but a triumphant one?  Who wouldn’t?  Yet, he so loved Jesus that where Jesus went, Peter followed, however reluctantly.

Isn’t Peter’s story often ours as well?  We prefer roses without the thorns, a happy life without pain, and so on.  Yet, we follow a crucified Savior who linked discipleship to carrying one’s crosses daily, as Jesus did and as Peter learned to do.

When the life’s road gets rough, turn to Peter for help.  Weak and wobbly as he could often be, he got it right in the end.  So can we.

God be Praised!

Gratefully,

V. Rev. Lewis S. Fiorelli, OSFS
Provincial

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To received DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Father Bill McCandless, OSFS
Oblate Development
wmccandless@oblates.org
Office: 302-656-8529 ext.20

Salesian Humility and Love

For Francis de Sales, the high point of the virtue humility is reached when we not only acknowledge but love our abasement, our pettiness, our embarrassing situations. At first view, this appears to be a very negative and demeaning aspect of this virtue. On further reflection, as Dr. Wendy Wright insightfully observes, to love our abasement is “to love ourselves as God loves us in our wholeness…in our blessings and brokenness.”

In accepting ourselves as God accepts us, we learn to love our humanity and begin to know how to love all human beings. So loving our abasement, our shortcomings opens us up to love, to love ourselves as God loves us and to love others. Humility is the virtue that makes us lovers because it creates in our hearts space for God and for others.

Wendy’s insight helps us to better appreciate why Jesus our Teacher wants us to learn from him because he is humble of heart. The virtue of humility gives us access to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and hence teaches us to love as Jesus loves. No wonder the virtue of humility is so highly valued and seen as foundational by De Sales.

Prayer: Humble and gentle Jesus, help us to value and strive for the virtue of humility so that we may be close to your heart and feel your loving vibrations for us and learn to love as you love. May you grant this request through your kindness and mercy.

God be Praised!

Fr. Sandy Pocetto, OSFS

DeSales University Professor Emeritus and retired Senior Vice President

This reflection originally appeared in DeSales Weekly, the e-newsletter of the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. 

To received DeSales Weekly, click Subscribe Here.

To see previous DeSales Weekly’s, click here.

For comments or suggestions about DeSales Weekly, contact the editor, Fr. Bill McCandless, OSFS

Father Bill McCandless, OSFS
Oblate Development
wmccandless@oblates.org
Office: 302-656-8529 ext.20