Advent Faith

For me, faith has always been confidence or trust in another.  I have faith in the mechanic who works on my car, the nurse to give me the correct medicine, the driver approaching who will stop at the red light, the person speaking with me is telling the truth, and that most people are genuinely fair, kind, and good.  In the Old Testament, people put their faith in God, His leaders, and His plan of freeing them from slavery, bringing them back from sin and promising a Messiah. 

The long-awaited Savior would gather the lost tribes (scattered because of sin), cleanse the temple (by making himself the new temple to seek forgiveness, become holy and offer right praise), defeat the enemy (sin, not hostile nations) and reign as Lord of all nations (a reality realized but in need of being accepted daily).   Some leaders had flaws, some people doubted, complained, or strayed, but through it all, God kept His promises by forgiving and renewing His covenant time and time again.  

In the New Testament, disciples left their livelihoods and family to follow this itinerant preacher who spoke not of vengeance, judgment and punishment but forgiveness, love, mercy and turning the other cheek.  They put their nascent faith in Jesus as he embraced children, loved the poor, dined with sinners and kept company with prostitutes, tax collectors and sinners.  He sought the last, the least, the lost and the lonely.  Richard Rohr noted that empathy for the victim became the most subversive element in Jesus’ teaching.  And while he cured the sick and forgave sins, he always spoke of the Father’s will, their relationship and invited all into this intimacy. 

More spectacular than restoring sight to the blind, hearing to those deaf and freeing those paralyzed and suffering from various ailments was Christ highlighting for others their faith which may have been unknown or latent.  Awakening this gift of faith invited them into a right relationship with Jesus and set them on the road to eternal life.  “Faith seems to be the attitude that Jesus most praises in people, maybe because it makes hope and love possible” (Jesus’ Alternative Plan, p.19).

The Messiah accomplished all four goals and continues to intercede on our behalf welcoming us back when we turn away with a sense of entitlement, cleansing our inner temple of the Holy Spirit by reminding us of his unconditional love and never giving up on us, defeating the enemy of sin, racism, hatred, bigotry, selfishness and the like with His grace and our cooperation and reigning as Lord of all nations of Heaven and Earth.  This is our faith.

 As I write this, I wake to a story of five people killed in an LGBTQ nightclub in Colorado Springs with more than twelve injured.  Club Q was the one safe haven in a community known for its anti-gay activism.  A misguided young man takes this away with his hate crime.  That same night, two men were stopped in New York, one wearing a Nazi armband, in connection with threats to attack a New York synagogue.  Faith sustains us in these moments to continue building the reign of God on Earth, that is, the world as God envisions it.  Faith empowers us to proclaim God as Lord of all nations, Ukraine, Russia, Iran, Iraq, the United States and every land and people God birthed into being.  Faith tells me that what God desires for our world must be embraced in the now.  Here is where the Gospel must flourish.  Anything contrary is unacceptable. 

Faith empowers us to do what we pray, ‘Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done.” That Reign of God is found in the home, at the workplace, on war-torn lands, in gay night clubs, in synagogues, mosques, temples, cathedrals and in us.  Faith is that gift that we can do better, we must do better.  Better put, faith is that gift that has us empowering God to do through our surrender, our trust, his vision and our willingness to give it a try today, tomorrow and always.  Faith enables us to be continually forgiven, nourished, held and kissed by our God.  It is that gift that convinces us that we are worthy of such infinite, unconditional love. 

Advent faith reminds us of God’s plan to share with us His divinity, which enhances our humanity from selfishness to otherness, from our will to God’s will, from division to communion, from slavery to freedom and from hatred to love.  Advent faith is the Savior of the World born in a stable, perfectly embracing our humanity and showing us how it is possible to “Live + Jesus.”  Faith makes the prophet Habakkuk’s words the motivating force that “the vision still has its time, presses on to fulfillment and it will not disappoint … and if it delays, wait for it for it will surely come” (Habbukuk 2:3).

May our faith make hope and love possible.  

Father John Fisher, OSFS

Pastor

Our Mother of Consolation Parish

Philadelphia, PA

Francis & Me: Marge Van Lierde

Marge Van Lierde: Parishioner of Our Lady of Good Counsel, Vienna, VA

Marge Van Lierde

I stumbled onto Saint Francis de Sales for the first time in 1984 when my husband and I registered at the parish around the corner from our new home in Vienna, VA. We joined  Our Lady of Good Counsel which is served by the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales.  Although I’d heard of him, I wasn’t familiar with Francis’ teachings.  I grew up in the Benedictine tradition, which was pretty much all the exposure I had to spirituality.  Learning about Saint Francis at my new parish felt like someone pulled up the blinds and let the light pour in!  I’ve loved being a part of this vibrant community.  Although I now live 16 miles away, I continue to be a parishioner because that’s where my heart is.

One of Francis’ teachings that has the biggest impact on me is living in the present moment.  Throughout the various seasons of my long life, I have leaned heavily on God in the present moment to care for me.  This has been especially true during serious health issues, the deaths of both my mother and husband within a year, while finding my way alone in a new world and now, during the challenges of old age.  

I must admit, it takes work, and I’m not always successful because sometimes daily living just rolls over me.  However, Francis is there to keep me going with his advice to start with God at the beginning of each new day.  Saying the Direction of Intention prayer helps me focus on offering my daily actions to God, asking for grace to handle difficult situations and enduring difficulties for love of Him.  I love that every day offers a new beginning, another chance to get it right.  I’m reminded of the song I heard many years ago during a Salesian retreat entitled  “We Fall Down,” especially the lyrics, “For a saint is just a sinner who fell down and got up.” 

Although it’s been 38 years since I first met this gentleman saint, I’m nowhere near where I’d like to be in my development and understanding of his spirituality.  Despite that, Francis continues to influence my life, often in surprising ways, as I continue my faith journey.  I’m so grateful for being nurtured and comforted by his Golden Counsels which have withstood the test of time for over 400 years.  I just wish I had stumbled upon him earlier!  

“No more war. War never again.”

Mekong Delta, rice paddy, South China Sea, Viet Cong, Viet Minh, Tet Offensive, Saigon, Hanoi, Ho Chi Minh Trail, agent orange, DMZ, hamlet, napalm, Pentagon Papers, draft lottery, deferment, Indochina, peace with honor, PTSD, quagmire.

If these terms and place names spark a memory, you probably lived through the time of war in Viet Nam, a tragedy enacted on the other side of the globe and brought into American living rooms courtesy of CBS, ABC, and NBC. You recall that this was a period of turmoil on campuses and streets and at dinner tables across the nation.  Otherwise, maybe you have studied this (ancient) history.

In 1975 when the North Vietnamese army overran Saigon, and America witnessed the final helicopter lifting off from the US Embassy, I was 14 and had a sure assumption that there would be no more war for us.   So much was learned from this quagmire in Southeast Asia and from the debates and battles on the homefront.  The draft ended.  We had a Bicentennial to celebrate.      

One Sunday in the 1990s, at a Northern Virginia parish where I was assisting with Masses, I visited with a priest from Viet Nam.  He shared his background and I asked how life changed after the war was over in 1975.   He politely related that the war had ended for us, but it was far from over at that time for his people and his family.  He shared about his uncle’s imprisonment and other privations and persecutions.   The US may have moved on to other things, but people in his home region did not have that option. 

Another insight came talking with a parishioner here in Camden, a vet who had served in the war and who bore unmistakable scars from that experience.  I shared how much I had enjoyed and learned from the multi-part Ken Burns and Lynn Novick documentary that had just come out about the war.  It looked at the conflict from the points of view of the various parties, trying to see the war through the eyes of all the stakeholders.  I told him, “It is well done and helpful—I bet you would like it.  I would like to hear what you think.”  He had not seen the series but heard it misrepresented and disrespected the military, the soldiers and the sailors.  Viet Nam really is not ancient history, not all issues are resolved.

Saint Pope Paul VI spoke to the UN General Assembly on October 4, 1965: 

“… If you want to be sisters and brothers, let the arms fall from your hands.  A person cannot love with offensive weapons in his hands.  Arms, and especially the terrible arms that modern science has provided you, engender bad dreams, feed evil sentiments, create nightmares, hostilities, and dark resolutions even before they cause any victims and ruins.  They call for enormous expenses.  They interrupt projects of solidarity and of useful labor.  They warp the outlook of nations.  So long as humans remain the weak, changeable, and even wicked being that we so often show ourselves to be, defensive arms will, alas, be necessary.  But your courage and good qualities urge you on to a study of means that can guarantee the security of international life without any recourse to arms…”

As we know too well, the Viet Nam War was not the last “recourse to arms” that humanity has seen.  Since February 24th we have witnessed the war in Ukraine—with its horror, waste and heroism on display.  None of this disruption and pain needed to happen, yet still it goes on and on, into a bitter winter ahead.  And of course, this is only the most visible of wars to Americans; many more are taking place around the world.

It struck me back in February that Vladimir Putin began a senseless, unnecessary war the same week a beautiful American died, Dr. Paul Farmer.  You may know that he is one of the founders of Partners in Health, an effort to bring good medical care to places in the world where that is not available.  The phrase he lived by is, “The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world.”    

Since I write from Camden, NJ, I want to end with a mention of a lovely Camden man, Father Michael Doyle.  He died during this month when we honor veterans and pray in particular for all who have gone before us to the fullness of God’s kingdom.  Google his name to find any of the several tributes and obituaries that sum up his life so well.  Since 1974 he was pastor of Sacred Heart Parish and dedicated his life to gathering with others to cooperate with God’s will for peace and justice in the Waterfront South neighborhood of Camden and in the wider world.   

The most remembered line from Saint Pope Paul VI’s UN speech is “No more war.  War never again.”  It is important to remember and to learn from outstanding peacemakers who by their conviction and practical work show that aspiration for peace is more than a dream or a flower-child slogan.  Each of us in our lives can build or destroy, heal or hurt.  The best way anyone can honor veterans and their sacrifice is to work so there are no more wars.  And we can remember outstanding peace-makers and their sacrifice by building and healing, supporting on every level efforts to make peace.  

Fr. Mike McCue, OSFS

DeSales Service Works

Camden, NJ

Francis & Me: Maureen A. Furletti

Maureen A. Furletti: Graduate Student, Loyola Institute for Ministry, Loyola University New Orleans; Parishioner, Our Mother of Consolation Church, Philadelphia, PA

Maureen A. Furletti

“Counting Our Blessings: Francis & Jane’s Tips for Growing Gratitude”

After many years of hosting, I have the routine down pat.  Order the turkey.  Review our favorite family recipes for stuffing, potatoes, and green beans.  Run to the Acme for the ingredients and grab extra canned goods for the school food drive.  Prepare the table with my grandmother’s porcelain dinnerware.  Accept my sister’s gracious offer to make a delightful dessert.  I checked all the boxes off my to-do list.

Yet, with all this running around, I fail to focus on the purpose of the holiday: Thanksgiving. 

One meal.  One day each year.  How is it that I too often let the importance of this holiday escape me?  Miriam sang, danced, and played the tambourine in thanksgiving to God for safely leading the Israelites out of slavery in Egypt.  King David sang songs of praise to God.  Certainly, gratitude and thanksgiving for God’s loving and lavish gifts should be at the top of my checklist - not just on Thanksgiving, but every day!

How can I incorporate gratitude into my daily life?  I look to my friends Francis and Jane for insight.  

Saint Francis de Sales and Saint Jane de Chantal remind me that I must first embrace a posture of humility.  Salesian Spirituality recognizes humility as a highly prized virtue.  Francis and Jane encourage me to abandon the “I-can-do-it-on-my-own” attitude and strive for a humble heart.  I am reminded that I cannot merit these gifts, but rather, God’s gifts are lavishly given because of God’s unconditional love.  

My saintly friends also teach me to find “little occasions” to offer thanksgiving.  I may not be able to compose songs of praise as beautiful and poetic as King David’s Psalms, but I could say a few simple words of gratitude to God while I’m waiting in line at the grocery store or stuck in traffic.  I think Francis and Jane would applaud these small steps towards holiness, not apart from my daily routine, but within it.

I will continue to look for ways to live well the virtue of humility and the habit of thanksgiving. What are your suggestions?

On November 20, Maureen Furletti will be presenting "Counting Our Blessings: Francis & Jane's Tips for Growing Gratitude" at “Third Sunday Enrichments” hosted by Our Mother of Consolation Parish ( 9 E Chestnut Hill Ave, Philadelphia, PA 19118). If you are in the area, please consider attending!

Reflection on Dad

Father Jack Kolodziej, OSFS, with his dad, John, and sisters (left to right) Donna, Maureen and Ellen celebrating John’s 80th.

Milestone birthdays are always special and celebrated with a little extra excitement.  This past Sunday my family pulled out all the stops as we came together for my dad’s 80th birthday.  My dad always told us that Father’s Day and his birthday are his favorite days, so we had a big party to commemorate this important event in his life.

As we smiled, laughed and enjoyed the celebration, I was thinking of the Gospel that was proclaimed throughout the church that morning at Sunday Mass.  Jesus spoke of earthquakes, plagues, wars, injustice, misery and violence – not the type of message that I would choose to kick off a party.

Yet, as I reflected on how the Scriptures spoke to me that day, it was a reminder that in the midst of death and destruction there will always be love and life.  Like anyone who has reached 80 years on this earth, my dad’s own journey has seen many moments of sadness and loss, but there was (and is) lots of joy, love and grace.

Life shows us that there will always be something to love; the world is full of things to love!  A lifetime is not long enough for the loving.  In the Bible, Saint Paul tells us that “where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, so that as sin reigned in death, grace might also reign through righteousness leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ” (Romans 5:20–21).

Father Jack Kolodziej, OSFS, with his dad, John

Our gathering last week was not only a chance to show our appreciation for my dad but an opportunity to celebrate life and love. Saint Francis de Sales summarizes this attitude when he taught us to live in the present moment. I pray that God continues to bless my father with good health, longevity and the grace to live each day well. I pray all our days will be filled with the strong bond of family, faith and love.

Reverend Jack Kolodziej, OSFS

Provincial

Wilmington-Philadelphia Providence

Change is Constant

Autumn began on September 22 and we went from days in the 80s and 90s to temperatures in the 60s and 70s, and the 50s a few weeks later.   One could see leaves beginning to change color, ever so slightly, and leaves began to fall from the trees.   There was a change in the air, as someone noted to me at table, “It feels like fall.”  And Pumpkin Spice Latte appeared in a variety of forms weeks before that!

Even memes on various platforms highlighted these changes.  Some rejoiced in the colors and cooler temperatures.  Others bemoaned the fact that they are simply a prelude to the frigidity of winter, the work of raking or blowing leaves, and trees that are bare.  However one feels about the season of autumn, it is a time of change for both good and ill.

Change is a fact of life.  A woman religious friend of mine often says, “The only thing certain in life is change.”  To some this is good.  To others, it is a challenge.  If someone enjoys change, they are positive.  If someone bemoans any change, they are negative.  I once attended a workshop where the presenter held up a diaper and said, “You know the only people who like change…[PAUSE]…are those wearing diapers, and even then the change isn’t appreciated until they are clean and dry because they’re wearing a new diaper.”  While we laughed at this example, we all knew that it was true.

But another constant in life can help us negotiate the changes that come our way.  God is with us at all times.  We are another “constant” in the midst of change.  Change happens to us.  Change happens through us.  Saint  Francis de Sales said, “Our hearts are trees, our affections and passions are their branches and our works or actions are their fruits” (Introduction to the Devout Life  4.  13 – 323). Notice it is our hearts, our, affections and passions, and our works.  God is with us, constantly, even when we are not conscious of God’s presence.

Our hearts, no matter what shape they are in at various points throughout our lives, are within us during every stage, and every change of life, until they no longer beat to give us life.  Our affections and passions, which can change greatly throughout our lives, even throughout a day, are branches on which the life situations we face are made known.  In good times, those leaves are beautiful, whether green like summer or with the rainbow of color that fall can provide.  In difficult times, those leaves start to fall and our branches become empty.  Emptiness seems overwhelming at times.  However, falling leaves make room for new growth that can come when our life cycle changes.  And those affections and passions become visible by how we live, the works we do or don’t do, and the places in which we place our energies and treasures.

When I was Chaplain at Ohio Dominican University, the school motto was “Connect your passion with your purpose.”  I would often rephrase that to “Connect your passion with God’s purpose.”  In other words, make God’s Will your will and look for God’s presence in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, no matter what that moment in your life looks like.  If we do that, the autumns of life give way to winters that help us lay fallow until a future spring brings new growth.  Isn’t living God’s Will the one constant the Saint Francis de Sales sets before us no matter what?

So, I ask you, how’s your heart this autumn: strong and steady or irregular and in need of an adjustment?  What are your affections and passions? Where we place our time and energy reveals the answer to that question.  As Scripture says, “By their fruits you shall know them.”  Does our passion reflect only our purpose or is God’s Will, evident too?  What needs letting go, like leaves in autumn, to make room for the growth that God can give?  I find this image, Lessons from Autumn, helpful in answering this question.

Yes, change is constant but so is God and so are we.  What kind of autumn will give way God’s new growth in you, even through the dead of winter?

Father Paul Colloton, OSFS

Superior, De Sales Centre Oblate Residence

Childs, MD

Choices

In our lifetime we make millions of choices. Some of them are simple like choosing between decaf or regular, chocolate or vanilla, whereas some are very serious and even life-changing. Should I marry this person? Is the Lord calling me to be a priest or religious? There are significant choices we make every day that reveal our values, our identity, and even express our faith. This past Tuesday many of us joined millions of Americans and made choices at the polls doing just that. Guided by our values, faith, and hopes, we chose people who we believe are like-minded with ourselves and will make good choices as elected officials, forming a democracy envisioned by our nation’s founders. 

In the months leading up to our journey to the polls, we have been bombarded with voices attempting to guide the choices we make there. Unfortunately, many of these voices have been rude, deceitful, smug, and divisive. Who has not heard someone bemoaning the distressing loss in the level of political discourse in our country? I am tired of the name calling, the vile accusations, the hate speech, and the demeaning way many politicians choose to treat others with differing opinions. These voices have gone to the extreme of supporting acts of violence and intimidation. It is beneath us. 

As those who have chosen to follow Christ, we are the people who commit ourselves to “Live Jesus.” Even Jesus struggled with choices. What else is the agony in the garden but a struggle with his choice to do the will of his Father? The theologian, Father Ron Rolheiser writes, “The choice Jesus faced that fateful night was not whether to die or not die. It was about how to die. Jesus’ choice was this: Do I die in bitterness or in love? Do I die in hardness of heart or softness of soul? Do I die in resentment or in forgiveness? We know which way he chose. His humiliation drove him to extreme depths, but these were depths of empathy, love, and forgiveness.”

Following this long and, at times, arduous journey to the polls, maybe it is time to reflect on our own choices. Are the choices we make done with empathy, love and forgiveness as guides? Do we bring the values and a Christlike way of living to our family life, our workplace, and in the interactions we have with others? Are our voices reflective of the choice we have made to “Live Jesus?”

Saint Francis de Sales writes, “I recommend to you the gentle and sincere courtesy which offends no one and obliges all, which seeks love rather than honor.” (Letters to Persons in the World IV 2)

What is your choice? Is it decaf or regular? Chocolate or vanilla? Hate and resentment, or gentle and sincere courtesy, the virtue that warranted Saint Francis de Sales to be called the “Gentleman Saint?”

Live + Jesus!

Father Jack Loughran, OSFS

Provincial

Toledo-Detroit Province

Francis & Me: Claire Burchell

Claire Burchell: Parishioner of Saint John Neumann Catholic Community, Reston, VA

Claire Burchell

When I returned to church in the late 1990s, I did not know anything about Salesian Spirituality.  Even after sitting in the pews week after week in our Oblate parish, I still did not have a clue.  I did notice, however, that the priests’ homilies were gentle to the ears.

What changed?  After I retired, I was able to spend more time at church, volunteering with various ministries where I experienced a caring community.  I read the Introduction to a Devout Life and attended the Salesian classes offered at my parish which enabled me to learn more about Saint Francis de Sales and his wonderful teachings.  It was about this time that I started attending the annual Live Jesus! retreats.  It was truly amazing to see close to a thousand people from different parishes and states come together to take part in these Salesian Spirituality celebrations. 

Eight years ago, my faith was rattled by a personal trauma.  For the first time in my life, I decided to seek spiritual guidance from a priest.  Father Tom Murphy, OSFS, was such a gentle soul.  I would describe him as a “gentle giant” in the Salesian vernacular.  As I sat with him many times, he would provide understanding and guidance for my journey.

When the parish had the Friday Stations of the Cross, we would use books by different authors.  One evening we were using the “Way of the Cross with Saint Francis de Sales.”  As I read the reflections, I noticed that some of them sounded familiar.  I commented to Father Tom that some of Saint Francis’ words were his words of advice to me.  When I pointed this out to Father Tom his response was, “After all these years as an Oblate he has had some impact on me.”  

I always enjoy reading the “Spirituality Matters” section in DeSales Weekly, the Oblate’s newsletter.  I find it interesting to see how Saint Francis’ teachings can be intertwined with the daily readings of the Gospel. 

At one of the Live Jesus! retreats, Father Jim Greenfield, OSFS, ended his homily with, “Do not worry about what might happen tomorrow: the same loving Father who takes care of you today, will take care of you tomorrow and every day.  Either He will shield you from suffering, or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it.  Be at peace, then, and put aside all anxious thoughts and imagination.”  I was surprised to find out that those were the words of Saint Francis de Sales.  These words, more than ever, ring true with me today.

All Saints, All Souls, All Month

When I was in high school, I saw a headline in a Catholic magazine for their November issue celebrating the month of All Souls.  The headline was “All Saints, All Souls, All Month.”  This expression always intrigued me.  I used to think that the commemoration of the saints and souls was just one more holy day, one more event in the Church calendar that could be “checked off” and then put aside as we moved on to the next feast.

As I have gotten older, as I have experienced more life and more death, I realized the power of that simple slogan.  It became a reminder that the celebration of our holy heroes, the memory of our deceased loved ones, and the belief in the “Communion of Saints” is not just something that we commemorate one day a year or only during a certain week.  In Catholic theology and practice, the connection we have with the saints and souls is something that we should remember all the time - every day, every year.

These celebrations are liturgical reminders that Christians are part of a Church that extends beyond time and space.  On All Saints Day we look to the future, remembering those who have gone before us in faith and who are now with the Lord.  We are inspired by the lives of the saints because they have run the race and have received the crown of victory.  We celebrate because we have the sure and certain hope that we, too, can reach this goal.  Saint Francis de Sales tells us that “the lives of the saints are nothing but the Gospel put into practice.”  

On All Souls Day we look to the past, to those who have fallen asleep in the hope of the resurrection.  We pray that our departed brothers and sisters will experience God’s love, mercy, and forgiveness as they transition to a new life in the Lord.  As the mystical Body of Christ, we believe that we can pray for one another all the time.  This is not just an option; it is our duty as Christians.  We need not be the holiest, most devout, most pious believer, nor do we need to be a religious sister or brother, priest, deacon, or bishop to accomplish this duty.

In the fall of 2020 Pope Francis issued an encyclical entitled Fratelli Tutti – Brothers and Sisters All.  The Holy Father called the Church and the world to remember we are all connected as sisters and brothers.  We are in relationship with all of humanity and we are responsible for one another, on Earth as is in heaven.  The celebrations at the beginning of November help us to remember that we are all in this together.  This message of faith and fraternity is something we must recall every day.  

The month of November is a reminder of the relational nature of Christian life, of relationship with those who have gone before us, with those who will follow after, and with the God who is the source of all relationships. 

May we remember this all month, all year.  May we practice this every day. 

Reverend Jack Kolodziej, OSFS

Provincial

Wilmington-Philadelphia Providence

Unmasked

This Halloween we had our usual share of trick-or-treaters at the parish rectory, knocking on the door and chanting in that sing-song way, “Trick or treat!”  It’s amazing to me that Halloween is now the second most popular holiday for adults in the United States (Christmas is still the first).  Yet, at the same time, Halloween is the one holiday where we don’t celebrate who we really are.  Instead, we put on masks and go door to door begging for treats, we disguise ourselves in order to get something good.

In a sense, this is a metaphor for real life.  How many of us disguise ourselves every day by putting on “masks” at home or at work in order to get what we think is good?  How many of us wear “masks,” that is, behave or do things that we believe will make us feel affirmed and liked; powerful and in control; secure and safe?  How many times do we get what we need by wearing masks?

If we are honest, it can be difficult to be ourselves.  It can be hard to freely express your own opinion or thoughts for fear of what others might say or think.  If you are in a restaurant and publicly pray over your food, some people may look at you as if they have seen a monster and, for some of us, that public shaming or disapproval is more frightening than anything we saw at our doors Halloween night.

The poet E.E. Cummings said it best, “To be nobody but yourself in a world that is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody but yourself — means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight — and never stop fighting.”

That’s why it’s great that the Church celebrates the Feast of All Saints right after Halloween.  All Saints Day is really the feast of those who took their masks off and lived lives free of artificiality and pretense.  All Saints Day celebrates the many different men and women over the centuries who became holy by taking the words of Saint Francis de Sales to heart, “Be who you are and be that well in order to give glory to God, the Master Craftsman whose masterpiece you are.”

We too can be saints.  We too are called to follow Saint Francis de Sales’ teaching and become holy.  We can live our lives without our masks.  All we need to do is approach the door of God’s love every day, acknowledge our sinfulness and respond to God’s mercy and grace. This invites us to take our masks off, humbly knock at God’s door as we are, and lovingly accept God’s “treats” — the grace and love He offers daily to us.

May God be praised!

Father Michael Newman, OSFS

Pastor

Holy Family Parish

Adrian, MI

Francis & Me: Tom Vresics

Tom Vresics: Founder of Salesian Lay Association of Men (SLAM)

Tom Vresics

“One single day of devotion is worth more than a thousand years of worldly life.” - Saint Francis de Sales 

What I have always loved about Saint Francis de Sales is that you can hardly find any writings of his that do not make some allusion to Scripture.  The above quote from de Sales is no different.  It reminds me of Psalm 84:10: "One day in your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere."

The biggest difficulty we face living this quote authentically and being truly devout is that while we may believe this in our heads, we often get distracted from feeling this with our hearts and living this truth in our actions.  We cannot experience devotion's sweetness until we believe it is good in itself, rather than attempting to be devout to gain some other good.  The optimistic yet practical nature of Salesian Spirituality offers us a blend of insightful beliefs, healthy attitudes, and helpful practices to fully grasp this eternal truth that de Sales urges us to embrace.  Namely, that a sincere and unique relationship with each member of the Trinity as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit is the ultimate good.

To that end, I established the Salesian Lay Association for Men, aka SLAM., ten years ago to share Salesian Spirituality’s unique approach toward getting the most out of life as God designed it.  Through our monthly meetings, I share Salesian insights such as the following:

• Developing a Salesian lifestyle based on the Introduction to the Devout Life.

  • Recognize your need for God so God may complete the good work the Holy Spirit has already begun in you.

  • Prayerfully invite God into your experience to discern the Father’s will for a happy, meaningful life despite life’s difficulties and setbacks.

  • Fulfill your daily responsibilities and meet the needs of others as a sign that you are truly listening to God and striving to “Live Jesus!”

  • In times of temptation and sin, never be afraid to turn toward each member of the Trinity found within the Sacraments of the Church.

  • Renew your desire to live a devout life hourly (Direction of Intention), daily (Preparation of the Day), monthly (Sacrament of Reconciliation), and yearly (Renewal of Baptismal Vows).

If you are interested in learning more about SLAM, please email Mr. Vresics at tvresics1@gmail.com. There are SLAM chapters at Georgetown Visitation, DC; the Lehigh Valley, PA; Philadelphia, PA; and Wilmington, DE.  The Georgetown Visitation Father’s Club (current and past GV parents) meets on the third Saturday of the month at 7:30 AM and is coordinated by Scott Troxell, a wonderful Salesian man and the father of two recent Visitation alums. 

*This reflection was first published in Georgetown Visitation Preparatory School’s e-reflection series, Loving Life, Living Jesus. For more inspiration about how to Live Jesus in our everyday lives, sign up here!

The 29th Rev. William A. Guerin, OSFS Memorial Dinner Dance

The Memorial Dinner Dance Returns to Center City!

Saturday, January 14, 2023

Union League, Center City

140 S. Broad Street, Philadelphia, PA 19102

This annual celebration is a great opportunity to come together in community and celebrate the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales and the late Father Bill Guerin, OSFS, as well as so many Oblates who work to spread Salesian Spirituality.  The Heartbeats are back for a lively, fun celebration!

This special event supports our priests and brothers whose lives have positively impacted countless students, parishioners, families, and co-workers. All funds raised are dedicated to caring for our infirm and retired men living at the Oblate Retirement Residence at Annecy Hall, MD and Salesiansum Residence.

PURCHASE A SPONSORSHIP OR TICKETS BELOW:

Francis & Me: Margaret Emerson

Margaret Emerson: Parishioner and Assistant Preschool Teacher at Saint John Neumann (SJN) Catholic Community

Margaret Emerson

I was first introduced to the teachings of Saint Francis de Sales in 1995 when I joined Saint John Neumann (SJN) Catholic Community in Reston, VA. Since I retired from my US government work in 2018 I have been able to delve much deeper into learning and practicing Salesian Spirituality. I have done this through attending Salesian Spirituality classes taught by my fellow parishioner, Carol Swiger, and in my ministry as an Assistant Preschool Teacher in the 3 and 4-year-old classes at SJN Catholic Preschool.

Although he died four hundred years ago, I consider Saint Francis de Sales to be my guide every day. In Carol’s classes, we discussed the pillars of Salesian Spirituality: Humility, Gentleness, Kindness, and Thoughtful Concern for Others. These foundational Little Virtues are essential for me to remember as I interact with my little students and I can practice these in many ways: gently offering my hand as a child struggles with the stairs, patiently helping a child button or zip a coat, showing our kiddos multiple times how to make the Sign of the Cross when we pray, daily singing the “Washing Hands Song” for them as they forget their hand washing sequence, happily cleaning up their crumbs or spills after snack, reading a favorite book, and playing a favorite game again and again.

In addition to demonstrating these virtues to our preschoolers, I often remind them to be kind to each other and to think about what the other child might want. We have a script for sharing toys that is hard for some children to practice. And some children are used to being the only ones at home and want to have all the attention or all the toys. Gently, I talk with them about sharing and looking out for each other. I am so gratified that by the end of the school year, they can talk about ways to be kind to each other and demonstrate kindness without my prompting. This is one of the great joys of teaching and gives me hope that the seeds of Salesian Spirituality that I have planted will grow and flourish in my students’ lives so they can “bloom where they are planted.”

Gratitude through Grief

Last week I was on the 45-minute drive from my home in Adrian, MI, to my office at St. Francis High School in Toledo, OH. That afternoon I presided at the funeral of Brother James Dorazio, OSFS. Brother Jim died on October 9 at 88 years of age. The day was well planned. My morning was filled with setting up the reception at the Oblate residence, setting up the church, meeting the funeral directors, informing lectors and other ministers at the Mass of their responsibilities, and greeting Brother Jim’s family from PA and MD.

As I drove, thinking about the funeral and Brother Jim, a man I’ve known for over 50 years, I also began thinking of my older brother’s funeral, which occurred just five days before. Somehow, my thoughts and feelings for both men started to intertwine, and grief hit me like a slap in the face. My eyes welled up and sadness filled my heart. It’s a good thing the drive was 45 minutes long; the time allowed me to pull myself together and face my tasks undistracted when I arrived in Toledo.

Brother Jim died after a very long and fruitful life. My brother, Gary, died at 77, but his life was not as linear as Brother Jim’s. Ten years before his death, my brother began to exhibit signs of Alzheimer’s disease. I’m sure you know what the journey for him and his wife was like following that diagnosis. It wasn’t easy, to say the least.

As I drove, both of these deaths coming so close together, set my mind and heart into a whirlwind of emotion and thoughts. We all face this when we lose someone we love. While I’m still dealing with grief and the millions of memories that arrive following the death of both of these men, I am stepping back a bit today and looking at what death means for those of us who have the risen Christ at the center of our faith.

I believe it is not uncommon for people to think our faith should be our strength and guide at times like these, and to succumb to grief, loss, and sadness is somehow a betrayal of that faith. The great consolation for me in this is the story of the raising of Lazarus by Christ. Even though he told those who followed him that he was going to Bethany to raise Lazarus, upon his arrival there, Jesus wept. Christ himself has sanctified grief, loss, and sadness. These feelings reflect the power of the sacredness of our love for others and our need for one another.

I cannot imagine facing the death of those I love without my belief in the resurrection and the hope of eternal life in God’s reign. That faith is not disturbed by my grief, but it gratefully illuminates the hope in which our faith allows us to live. So, while I had my moment of despair on that daily trip I made to Toledo, I also found consolation in Christ and the resurrection. I am eternally grateful to God for this gift and to those who nurtured it in me.

In the words of Saint Francis de Sales, “Unhappy is death without the love of Christ; unhappy is love without the death of Christ!” (Treatise on the Love of God, Book 12, Chapter 13)

Father Jack Loughran, OSFS

Provincial

Toledo-Detroit Province

We Cherish the Memories

“Salesian Sands,” the Oblate house in Ft. Myers.

My first assignment after ordination was to teach at our high school in Fort Myers, Florida.  Shortly after arriving, our principal and the Oblate pastor across the street went for a drive to look at a small house on Fort Myers Beach.  In order to attract young Oblates to southwest Florida, they wanted a place for the Oblates and their families.  It was a small three-bedroom rancher very close to the beach.  The Provincial agreed to pay for the place with the proviso that we would send $50 per Oblate each month until the mortgage was paid. 

Another Oblate and dear friend, Hugh, and I were the first “caretakers” of the house.  We gradually furnished the house in a modest, yet comfortable way.  On Fridays, we loaded our laundry baskets in the car during the school day.  We were the first off the property to enjoy a weekend at the beach.  Others joined us when available.  The parish priests used the place during the week.  One of the parishes we assisted on the weekends was just around the corner from our residence.  Three doors exited to the pool with its screened lanais.  One was from the laundry room where minutes before exiting the pool on a nightly swim, we would put towels in the dryer for comfort when exiting.  We were living like kings! 

Growing up, I knew no one who had a pool.  Life was good!  Our students knew we had a place on the beach and were determined to locate it but never did.  Personal money was tight but The Munch Box, around the corner, made great hot dogs.  There was time for sleeping on the beach, a dip in the pool, college and pro football, card games, and great camaraderie.  Classes for the week always were prepared as well.  At about 7:00 PM on Sundays, we cleaned the house thoroughly and had dinner at Perkins on the way home (always ham and cheese omelets).  A guest calendar became quickly booked for visiting family, friends, and fellow Oblates.  What started out as a place of respite, relaxation, and renewal for those in the high school and our parish across the street, grew in the 30+ years to include three other Oblate parishes.  It was a gathering place for Oblates.

The ceramic Oblate shield was part of the living room floor in the Oblate house.

After the hurricane, Hugh sent me three short videos taken from what was our front door.  Everything was gone.  You could make out the pool sans lanais.  To the right were the washer and dryer, now outside.  All was outside, as there was no inside.  All three videos ended on the ceramic Oblate shield that was part of the living room floor.  Central was the cross.  Perhaps it symbolized the loss suffered, as we all need to participate in Christ’s suffering.  Perhaps, it symbolized the victory won for us by Christ that gave us this place to enjoy God’s presence, especially in those with whom we recreated. 

This house was built on sand (figuratively) and could not withstand this hurricane.  Many times, the Oblate caretaker went down to close the shutters for an impending storm.  We did this with Ian but mother nature was too powerful.  We never tired of this gift known as Salesian Sands.  We cherish the memories of the laughter and the good food shared with our Oblate family and, by extension, our own families and friends. Those moments and stories (often exaggerated as the years grew) will sustain us and continue to give us grateful hearts. 

But, many lost their only home.  As is always the case, the poor (e.g., the shrimpers who lived on boats) suffered the greatest.  Our prayers go out to all those who lost their possessions, homes, and livelihood.  Above all else, we pray for those who died and for their loved ones who mourn their loss. 

Hurricane Ian is proof of Saint Francis de Sales’ maxim to “Live Today Well.”  Let us live it well in love, sharing, accepting, and forgiving.  Let us live it praying for an end to violence, discord, enmity, and hatred.  We need to hold on to memories of compassion, understanding, and kinship.  Never has the demand been more expedient to “Live Today Well.”

“For all that has been, thanks. For all that will be, yes.” -Dag Hammarskjold

Father John Fisher, OSFS

Pastor

Our Mother of Consolation Parish

Philadelphia, PA

Becoming a Daughter of St. Francis de Sales

Father Jack Kolodziej, OSFS, with Eileen Sherman, Daughter of St. Francis de Sales.

The Daughters of St. Francis de Sales are vital members of the Salesian family. They are lay Catholic women (whether single, married, or widowed) who live their lives grounded in the Gospel and the spirit of Saint Francis de Sales. The Daughters are part of the Association of St. Francis de Sales. They are an international group of women with members living in 21 countries around the world. There are also Sons of St. Francis de Sales.

The most common way for a woman to become interested in learning about the Daughters of St. Francis de Sales is to be invited by a friend who is already a member.  Typically, an invited friend attends a few meetings to discern if she is being led by the Holy Spirit to ask for an Aspirant application.  Others might discover our website and signup for information sessions on Saint Francis de Sales. 

Bernie Heffernan (front row-third from left) and Eileen Sherman (front row- first from left) were blessed with the attendance of several Daughters from both the Wilmington, DE and West Grove, PA groups.

After a person is admitted by our Regional Directress to begin a three-month time of discovery, they may apply for the first year and then a second year of formation.  These 2+ years follow a series of readings about Salesian Spirituality.  Each person is guided through the formation with an assigned companion (a Consecrated Daughter who has extended her studies in a continuing formation program).

Eileen Sherman (second from left) and Bernie Heffernan (third from left) make their vows.

If consecration is requested and recommended by the Regional Directress and by our General Directress in Paris, France, the future member is called to make the commitment for life to live the fullness of her baptismal promises.  This consecration commitment ceremony takes place at a Mass.  

A Consecrated Daughter usually is a member of a local group that meets once a month (2 hours) for a meeting that focuses on Salesian studies, called probations – the same studies used worldwide.  Probations are in-depth readings primarily on the “Little Virtues” taught by Saint Francis de Sales: patience, humility, charity, gentleness, etc.  These monthly gatherings support spiritual friendship, animated by prayer and sharing inspired by the Holy Spirit.   

Susan Brubaker

Daughter of St. Francis de Sales 

Are you interested in learning more about the Daughters or Sons of St. Francis de Sales? Email info@oblates.org or visit sfdsassociation.org.

Meet Father John Kasper, OSFS, Senior Religious and Member of the Toledo-Detroit Provincial Council

Father John Kasper, OSFS

Although a native of Toledo, Ohio, and a 1967 graduate of St. Francis de Sales School where the seeds of his Oblate vocation were first planted, John’s ministry in parochial leadership has spanned the country. After graduating from Niagara University and receiving a Master of Divinity degree at the Toronto School of Theology, he was ordained in his hometown of Toledo in 1979 and first served in parish and campus ministry in Buffalo, NY. In 1980, John and three other members of his province made a bold move to head West and serve in the Diocese of Denver. St. Michael the Archangel Parish in Aurora, Colorado provided a dynamic setting with a collegial staff in a rapidly-growing suburban area. In the span of six years, the parish grew from 200 families to 2200 families. After that intense time, John requested a study sabbatical and moved further West to California to pursue a Master of Theology degree in Worship & the Arts at the Jesuit School of Theology within the Graduate Theological Union of Berkeley.

“California Dreamin’” became more than a hit song by The Mamas & the Papas for John. The Bay Area in Northern California proved a rich setting for creative ministry and an opportunity to bring the spirit of Saint Francis de Sales to many people who were unfamiliar with the gentleness, optimism, and Christian humanism of the “gentleman Saint” who is a secondary patron of the Diocese of Oakland. Since 1987 John has served in three parishes there as Director of Music and Worship at St. Joseph Basilica in Alameda, as Parochial Vicar at Corpus Christi Parish in Piedmont, and, for the past twenty-five years, as Pastor of St. Perpetua Catholic Community in Lafayette. Over the years many Oblate have enjoyed John’s hospitality for a few days or a few weeks and the beauty and culture of the Bay Area, including a visit to the vineyards of Napa and Sonoma.

John resonates with the wide diversity of parish life. No two days are the same and he has enjoyed the various roles a parish priest is required to carry out. Besides the ministry of presiding and preaching at Eucharist and the Sacraments, John has been involved in major capital campaigns and building and renovation projects in each parish setting. Pastoral counseling, preparing young couples for marriage, adult and youth catechesis, serving on Diocesan commissions, liturgical presentations, and workshops throughout the Diocese – all these avenues of service have made parish ministry a challenging and rewarding experience for him. John especially strives to make the Sunday liturgical experience a time of grace and inspiration for each community through beautiful music, an attractive environment, and meaningful preaching that touches the real lives of parishioners. Before he left California this summer to move to the Ohio/Michigan area, John was recognized as “Pastor & Preacher” by Sunday to Sunday, an Emmy-winning video series that documents inspirational preaching with interviews, dialogue, and filming of homilists in action plying their trade. John was also honored for years of service as a Board Member of Hope Solutions, a faith-based organization whose goal is to provide permanent supportive housing and vital services to formerly homeless and vulnerable members of Contra Costa County.

Stained-glass windows at St. Perpetua Church

John is grateful for the many Oblates, parishioners, ministerial colleagues, and fellow clergy with whom he has had the privilege to serve. He said, “Enthusiasm is contagious, and I’ve been fortunate to work with so many creative and enthusiastic people over the years. One of the last collaborative projects I enjoyed was working with design consultants and a glass artist to create a set of large stained-glass windows for St. Perpetua Church based on Psalm 148 and the Canticle of Daniel – “Let All Creation Bless the Lord.” The windows echo the concern Pope Francis expressed in his 2015 encyclical Laudato Si’- “On Care for our Common Home.”

Learn more about Father John:

During the first year of the isolation of the Covid pandemic, Father John stayed in touch with members of the parish through a weekly online message of hope, consolation, and encouragement. Read here: “Lessons Learned” by Father John Kasper, OSFS.

Finding True Healing

Saint Luke

Traditionally, each Oblate community has a designated library in their local residence. In an Oblate library, you will find many different types of literature. However, I would say that the majority of books are works of theology, history, and biographies of famous people.

A few years ago, when we were cleaning out the library of the Father Judge Faculty House, I came across a tattered paperback that was a combination of the three most popular categories I listed above. The book was called Dear and Glorious Physician and was about Saint Luke, the writer of the third Gospel. The title is from an older translation of Colossians 4:14 in which Saint Paul referred to Luke as "the beloved physician."

This historical novel tells the story of a young Greek slave who apprenticed with a man of medicine and science to become a respected physician with a reputation for healing both body and spirit. Luke traveled around the ancient world bringing healing and hope to everyone he came in contact with. Yet his own sufferings and sorrows could not be healed until he discovered the life, death, and restoring power of Jesus of Nazareth and his resurrection.

The author of this study of Saint Luke was Taylor Caldwell, a writer who is best known for her successful 1972 novel Captains and the Kings. Before she found fame and status in the 1970s, Ms. Caldwell found faith and hope. This is what she tried to share through her writings.

At the time it was released, Ms. Caldwell described her work in this way, "The story of Lucanus, Saint Luke, is the story of every man's pilgrimage through despair and life's darkness, through suffering and anguish, through bitterness and sorrow, doubt and cynicism, rebellion and hopelessness, to the feet and the understanding of God. The search for God and the final revelation are the only meaning in life for men."

When I left Father Judge a few years ago, I brought this little book with me. It collected dust on my bookshelf until I finally picked it up this past summer. I found the book to be everything the author expressed. The book gave me an insight into Saint Luke and his own search for healing and redemption. In many ways, the image of Saint Luke that emerged from this novel is the image of the "wounded healer" that the great spiritual writer Henri Nouwen reflected on exactly twenty years after Dear and Glorious Physician was first published.

This past week, the Church celebrated Saint Luke's feast day (October 18). This year, as I remembered a great saint and evangelist, I also recalled his first calling as a wounded healer. A book that is over 60 years old helped me to see God at work in our world today.

The life of Luke and the story of his conversion is an example for all of us. Today we are blessed by the miracle of modern medicine, science, and technology. We can find relief from pain, cures for diseases, and many procedures and medications that will make our bodies strong and our lives more comfortable.

As a doctor, Luke worked all of his life to find ways to help his fellow human beings live a healthy life. It was only when he encountered the Risen Lord that this beloved doctor found the true way to life - eternal life. At the end of his Gospel, Luke recounts how two disciples recognized the Lord on the way to Emmaus. When we walk our own roads in life we will find many roadblocks, struggles, and detours. May our encounter with the Risen Lord help us to overcome these obstacles and to find true healing. May our faith help us to live each day well.

Rev. Jack Kolodziej, OSFS

Provincial

Wilmington-Philadelphia Providence

Francis & Me: Elisabeth Showalter

Elisabeth Showalter: Mathematics Teacher, Georgetown Visitation Preparatory School, Washington, DC

"If you contemplate the Lord frequently in meditation, your whole soul will be filled with Him, you will grow in His likeness, and your actions will be molded on His." - Saint Francis de Sales

Elisabeth Showalter

Accomplishing the Extraordinary

As a child, one of my greatest desires was to have superpowers. I remember sitting in traffic wishing that I had the power to make the car fly or playing hide-and-seek and wishing I could make myself invisible. Upon reflection, I realized that what I desired was to have my body filled with superpowers that allowed me to transform the world around me, to transform it into something extraordinary.

As I reflected on Saint Francis’ words, I realized that what Francis promises is exactly what I longed for as a child, but what Francis promises is much more powerful than my childhood dreams! He promises that when we unite ourselves to Christ through prayer and contemplation we are inviting Christ to permeate our entire being; we are inviting Him to fill us with the graces necessary to transform the world into something extraordinary. Christ created the world; He designed everything from the freckles on our noses to the beauty of the sunset. I can not even begin to imagine what He will accomplish through us as our lives and actions are molded to His.

I may never be able to make cars fly, but as Francis tells us, the Lord will be able to accomplish extraordinary things through us if we only invite Him to do so.

*This reflection was first published in Georgetown Visitation Preparatory School’s e-reflection series, Loving Life, Living Jesus. For more inspiration about how to Live Jesus in our everyday lives, sign up here!

Francis & Me: CJ Capen

CJ Capen: Director of Music at St. John Neumann Parish, Reston, VA

CJ Capen

"Nothing is so strong as gentleness; nothing is so gentle as real strength." - Saint Francis de Sales

Gentleness is not typically a quality we associate with strength, yet here we see Francis de Sales say, “nothing is so strong as gentleness.”  How different this is from the ways of the world.  

I grew up going to St. John Neumann Catholic Community, a church in Reston, VA, staffed by the Oblates of St. Francis de Sales. I recall thinking as a child that St. John Neumann felt different from other churches I had been to; there was a warmth about it that was hard to describe.  The priests were genuine, they were approachable, and they had a certain joy about them.  They did not present themselves as “holier than thou,” but more as one of us. My family would tend to describe them to others as “down-to-earth.”  St. John Neumann Church felt very alive, the people of the parish loved their church, and they loved their priests. 

In my early 20s I read the Introduction to the Devout Life by Saint Francis de Sales.  Suddenly the dots connected for me. What I remembered of the priests from the church I grew up in aligned with the teachings of Saint Francis de Sales.  De Sales taught that it begins with humility and this true humility leads to gentleness toward our neighbor.  St. John Neumann Church was a thriving community, and I’m now certain it had much to do with this Salesian Spirituality. 

Francis de Sales said all must be done in love, nothing by force. Oh, and he said this in the face of the Reformation.  Francis decided one day that he needed to lead an expedition to convert the 60,000 Calvinists in Switzerland back to Catholicism.  Most thought this to be a crazy plan; his diocese nor even his father supported him, and for three long years, Francis had doors slammed in his face with not one person being converted.  Amazingly though, after much patience and perseverance, he eventually managed to convert some 40,000 people from Calvinism back to Catholicism.  He did not do this by means of large crowds, but through letters, one-on-one conversations, and by playing with the children which led to conversations with their parents.  He empowered the laity, for he said all were called to holiness, that it is not just for a select few.  It’s an inspiring story, one of patience, gentle strength, and authentic faith.  His incredible efforts for the laity made me think: “Do I fully embrace my call to holiness?”  Francis says, “Learn to see God in the details of your life, for he is everywhere.”

It might be interesting to note here, after graduate school, I did return to St. John Neumann to serve on staff as Director of Music, which is where I have been for the last 14 years.  Where else would I be?!  It was in the Salesian Spirituality that I felt at home.